Love Lost And Found: A Holiday Romance Read online

  The café had a cozy small-town Texas vibe, completed by the massive tin Lone Star hanging over their door. The farmer’s wife was a nice woman who seemed to love what she did. She worked by herself in the café ten hours a day, baking and cooking and making barista drinks. She talked with them about the weather and how the winter posed to be rough according to the Farmer’s Almanac as she prepared their desserts. Lara had to get a pumpkin spice latte and a slice of pie, while Aunt Lynn got a pumpkin shake and Uncle Joey got a pumpkin brownie.

  The pumpkin spice latte was good; the pie was good too, though nothing like Aunt Lynn’s. Lara made sure to tell Aunt Lynn that, to ease Aunt Lynn’s obvious jealousy. “It just looks pretty. Really no flavor there,” Uncle Joey agreed.

  Aunt Lynn shrugged. “I don’t mind this shake, either.”

  “Why did you get a shake?” Lara laughed.

  “If you eat ice cream in the middle of winter, you feel warmer,” Aunt Lynn responded.

  “Don’t mind her,” Uncle Joey said. “She’s always been weird like that.”

  “Your mother was the same,” Aunt Lynn reminisced. “Always ate ice cream in the dead of winter. We always had a gallon of vanilla and a gallon of strawberry in our freezer. Even at school we would get ice cream with lunch and everyone would tease us. It really works, though. Our mother taught us that trick.”

  Lara felt the urge to look at photos of her mom that afternoon when they got back home. In her wallet, she kept a photo of her mom holding her when she was just born, still in pink booties and a pink knit cap. The expression on her mom’s face was so serene, so happy. Even the exhaustion of childbirth did not make her any less pretty. She seemed proud of her baby, and had swaddled her in a pink crocheted blanket that she herself had been swaddled in as a baby.

  Everything of Lara’s had been hand-me-downs, usually crocheted or knitted by Gramma or her great-gramma and passed on through the generations. Sometimes, when it got really cold in Seattle, she still slept under a butterfly quilt that her great gramma had passed down to her mother. She had vague memories of her mother using that blanket in the hospice. Now, Lara relied on it to keep warm, while reminding herself of her mom as she slept with it pulled up to her chin. Sometimes she broke it out and held it when she was missing her mom especially much. The blanket had a special scent. Lara could not tell if the scent was her mother’s. It had been so many years that it probably wasn’t. Yet she liked to think that was her mother’s scent, and she always associated it with how her mother must have smelled, even if it was not so.

  They left the café with a case of homemade root beer and some homemade pumpkin butter to put on toast. Uncle Joey also bought them each pumpkin fudge squares. Despite the richness of the fudge, the pumpkin spice added to the chocolate was very yummy.

  The drive back to town was slow. It grew dim and started to rain. Uncle Joey played old country on the radio. Lara hugged the heavy pumpkin on her lap and smiled. These were the moments that she could not live without.

  Aunt Lynn immediately got to work preparing the pumpkin flesh for pie filling once they got home. It took a day for the filling to turn out right, so she couldn’t wait to begin her baking the next day. Lara helped her, though she hated the slimy feeling of pumpkin guts going up her forearms. When all the flesh had been harvested and Uncle Joey filled a baking sheet with pumpkin seeds to roast in his garage, Lara asked for a ride to Cassie’s.

  Cassie’s house was truly disappointing. It was a manufactured home, sitting at a slight angle with the hill it had been placed on. Colorful plastic kids’ toys and a swing set dominated the yard. Behind the house, Lara could see the taut blue wall of an inflatable pool, empty of water but still sitting tethered to the back deck. It was a big, despondent blue reminder that summer was long gone.

  “Girl! Oh my God!” Cassie squealed. She leaned over the door threshold and smashed Lara into her rotund tummy and enormous bosom. She was softer, slightly heavier, and slightly more worn, but she was still the same smart-alecky and freckled Cassie.

  “Cassie!” Lara squealed back, feeling overcome. She placed a hand on Cassie’s protruding tummy. “He’s not kicking?”

  “Not right now. He will in a moment, trust me. The kid won’t stay still. Anyway, come on in!”

  The trailer was at least nice inside. Cassie had decorated it with taste. There were kids’ toys scattered across the living room, but the place was not messy. A little boy ran up to Lara holding out a Batman doll.

  “Devon, say hi to your godmother, Lara.”

  Devon lowered his toy in a sudden fit of shyness. “Hi,” he said.

  “Hi.” Lara beamed down at the boy. He looked so much like Cassie. She imagined having a small child of her own, a girl maybe. Her heart twinged suddenly. Since losing her own mom, small children and the idea of motherhood charmed her, but also scared her.

  Devon seemed to sense Lara’s heavy thoughts and suddenly gave her leg an awkward hug. Then he scurried off to some nether part of the house, probably his bedroom.

  “Wish I could offer you some wine, but I don’t keep it in the house,” Cassie laughed.

  “That’s OK,” Lara laughed. “I’d feel terrible drinking wine in front of you while you’re pregnant.”

  “Well, here’s coffee. Like my new espresso machine? Found it at Target for thirty bucks!” Cassie showed off the shiny stainless steel and black machine on her counter.

  “Oh. How nice. Your house is really nice.” Lara suddenly got the awkward sense that she and Cassie would not have that much to talk about today.

  But Cassie had other ideas. She yakked about her husband as she brewed Lara and herself lattes.

  “Hmm. This is actually really good,” Lara said, as she sipped the steamy drink. “Not bad for a home machine.”

  “Right?!” Cassie plopped down onto a chair across from Lara. “So. Word is, Kyle Brennan is back in town for Thanksgiving. He just got a divorce and he’s been taking some personal time at home with his family.”

  Lara rolled her eyes. “So Aunt Lynn tells me.”

  “You haven’t seen him at all in Seattle? Not even once?”

  “No. Why would I see him in Seattle?”

  “Well that’s where his firm is.”

  Lara nearly fainted. “He’s been living in Seattle too? Seriously?”

  “Wow, you didn’t know? You don’t even follow him on Facebook?”

  “Of course not. I’ve had no contact with him since he dumped me.”

  “You can’t seriously still be sore about that? That was four years ago. Honestly, I’m still surprised you two didn’t make it. You were like the It couple. You gave us other regular girls hope.”

  Lara rolled her eyes again. “That’s what I thought too back then, but eight years is a long time. I’ve gotten over him. It just wasn’t meant to be. He wasn’t the great person that he seemed to be.”

  “He sure was hot back in high school. And he’s only gotten hotter, really. Look.” Cassie grabbed her phone and pulled up a picture of Kyle. She did it so fast that it seemed like she had saved his picture just to show Lara.

  Undoubtedly, he was still very good-looking. Perfect blonde hair, green eyes like hooks into the soul. Lara suppressed a violent surge of emotion that rose within her. “Ugh, put that away. I don’t know if you and my aunt have some kind of conspiracy, but I’m so over Kyle. I’ve moved onto men that actually appreciate me for who I am.”

  Actually, that was a lie. Most of the men she had dated since Kyle had not appreciated her at all. Her dating life had been like a game of Minefield, going out with men and then running away from heartbreak right when she realized they didn’t really care about who she was at all. It was so hard to find men who listened or who didn’t try to change her.

  Cassie seemed to still possess the Best Friend Lie Detector and she just surveyed Lara with a smirk. “You haven’t really had one serious boyfriend since Kyle.”

  “That’s not true!”

  “Oh, are you
counting Ponytail Pete in art school? That guy was a joke.”

  Lara had to laugh. “We were together for two years, Cassie,” she said, but then agreed, “And yeah. He was a joke.”

  Ponytail Pete had seemed like the logical choice after her disaster with Kyle. She was only eighteen and heartbroken, and Ponytail Pete from her 3D design class had been just the opposite of Kyle. He was sensitive and liked to write her love haikus on pink tissue paper rolled into the shape of roses. He played guitar for a metal core band, and had dreams of one day composing movie scores. Their relationship had lasted a little over two years and sometimes Lara had even thought she would marry him. But her family had hated him and eventually she had grown tired of him too. She ended things when he dropped out of the Art Institute to start his own graphic design business, and ended up just delivering pizzas for Domino’s and smoking pot all the time. She couldn’t be with someone as aimless as Ponytail Pete. He was a good person, though, and they still talked from time to time.

  Sadly, that had been her longest relationship after Kyle. All of her others had barely made it past a few months. Again, she kept dating guys, guys with goals and purpose, only to find out that their goals were more important than hers. She was constantly feeling like the men she picked didn’t take her seriously. They all treated her career like a hobby, never mind she was actually making a great living doing what she loved.

  “You and Wyatt seem to be doing well,” Lara said, trying to change the subject.

  Cassie’s smile slipped slightly. “Ehh. We’re doing better.”

  Lara wasn’t sure if she should bring up a conversation she and Cassie had had a few months earlier. In the middle of a Facebook chat, Cassie had mentioned that she and Wyatt were getting a divorce. But Cassie clearly didn’t want to talk about it.

  “Wyatt is still at the oil fields, so he’s only here every other week. So I’m pretty much alone with Devon. It’ll be so hard when the baby comes.”

  “Would you need any help? Maybe I could take time off of work and come help you for a little while.”

  Cassie’s eyes lit up. But then she smiled and said, “I’ll be OK. My mom is pretty good about helping me. So is Wyatt’s cousin. She’s always babysitting Devon when I need a personal day.”

  “That’s great. Why aren’t you seeing Wyatt’s family this week?”

  “I guess his parents are going on some kind of cruise. So we’re here.”

  “I’m so glad. I hated never getting to see you.”

  “I know. So, anyway, what do you say we go by Kyle’s dad’s golf course? Just for lunch maybe? And see if we run into him.” Cassie’s eyes glimmered with mischief.

  “No!” Lara said.

  Nearly five hours later, Cassie finally needed a rest and Lara went home. She was helping her aunt cut up leeks in the kitchen when the doorbell rang.

  “I’ll get it!” Aunt Lynn crowed. She seemed to be in an unusually fluttery, excited mood. She put the cooking show she was watching on Mute and hurried to the front door. There was a moment of silence, and then Aunt Lynn rounded the corner into the kitchen with someone very tall behind her.

  And then Lara saw who it was and she nearly fainted.

  Chapter 3: Kyle Brennan

  Kyle Brennan the III towered in the kitchen doorway with a bouquet of flowers. He was so tall that he left a looming shadow across the linoleum. His blond hair was swept over handsomely and his smile was charmingly awkward.

  “What- what are you doing here?” Lara demanded.

  Kyle looked taken aback. “Well, uh, your aunt Lynn here, uh, invited me over.”

  Lara glared at her aunt. “How could you?”

  “Lara!” Aunt Lynn admonished. “Don’t be so rude. You two haven’t seen each other in years. Why don’t you hug him?”

  Lara wasn’t about to hug Kyle. She could only stare at him, her heart thudding.

  “Should I not stay for dinner?” Kyle asked awkwardly, laying the flowers onto a side table.

  “Oh, no, stay. She’s just surprised, is all.” Aunt Lynn swooped up the flowers and went to find a vase.

  “Well. That was sneaky,” Lara finally said.

  “I wanted you to see you and say hello. And your aunt always was the best cook in town. Even better than my mom. Well, you know how my mom can’t cook.” Kyle laughed awkwardly.

  Lara remembered how ashamed she used to feel, having Kyle over for dinner in high school. Her house had always seemed ten times as dingy whenever he came over. She had always become acutely aware of every stain in the linoleum and threadbare spot on the sofa. In comparison, Kyle’s shiny new house above the golf course his father owned had always seemed like a palace to her. She had never felt comfortable in there, because Kyle’s mom was always watching her, making sure she didn’t prop her feet on the glass coffee table or track mud across the fluffy white carpet. That was the kind of house she always imagined one day being rich enough to own, maybe somewhere like Beverly Hills.

  “So you’re a multimedia design consultant for Thomas Avery Publications?” Kyle said.

  “Yes, how did you know that?” Lara demanded.

  “It’s a small town. Your aunt told me all about it.” He shrugged, looking a little bit guilty. “And I saw it on your LinkedIn.”

  “Ah.” Lara remembered denying Kyle’s request to connect on LinkedIn about a year ago. Just when she had almost totally forgotten him, he had popped into her life. She had been so annoyed that day.

  “It seems like the perfect career for you,” he went on. “You must have some mad computer skills to do that.”

  “Well it’s what I went to the Art Institute for,” she responded.

  “Very nice. Well I’m glad you’re happy. It seems you upgraded from the watercolor set, then.”

  Lara was suddenly incensed. “I still watercolor. You’re saying my watercolors weren’t very good?” How Kyle, to put her down in the guise of complimenting her.

  “No, no, no.” He held up his hands in defense. “I loved your watercolors. You had – you have a lot of talent. I just wasn’t sure if you still did that. That’s all. You seem to be using a lot of advanced technology for your art now.”

  Lara calmed a bit. “Yes, well, watercolors are still my hobby. I sell some of my paintings, actually.” Not that she had sold a one, but how could Kyle know that?

  “So you’re a successful painter, too. Wow. I always knew you could go far.”

  Aunt Lynn returned to the room with the flowers in a pretty cobalt vase. “Lara, do you want to set this somewhere?” she asked.

  Lara reluctantly set them on the mantelpiece in the living room. Kyle really had chosen a nice bouquet. It even had purple daisies in it, Lara’s favorite. One of her best paintings had been of purple daisies.

  “Sweet tea?” Aunt Lynn chirped.

  Lara nodded. “Yes, please,” Kyle said. He still was every bit the polite gentleman he had been in high school. Actually, now even more so. His lawyer career had served to make him extremely suave. It enraged Lara. He was so perfect and so smug, all the time!

  Aunt Lynn exited the living room to make two glasses.

  “I guess you’re a lawyer now?” Lara said.

  “Yes, actually. Just made partner at my firm.”

  “Well, that’s great to hear. I’m very, uh, sorry about your divorce,” Lara said. “How long are you in town for?”

  “I go back to Seattle next week. I took two weeks off for myself to get my head clear.”

  Lara had to suppress chills again. “I still can’t believe you live in Seattle. I had no idea.”

  Kyle grinned. “I was surprised to find out, too, when I looked you up on LinkedIn. Maybe we’ve walked by each other and never even realized it.”

  The idea alarmed Lara. More than once she had thought she had seen Kyle in passing, but she always blew it off, attributing her visions of his tall, blond frame to her imagination. What if he had seen her at some bar, or at a sidewalk café? Maybe he had dismissed seeing he
r as part of his imagination, too. Suddenly she wondered if he ever had coffee at the Zoot Suit Café, where her artwork hung. She was too ashamed to ask him, in case he thought her watercolor skills really were subpar.

  “I live in the Central District, so I don’t know if you would have seen me around,” she said.

  “Well I’m not just confined to the rich part of town, you know. I like to try new places. I go to this little place called the Depressed Poet sometimes. They have Poe readings and a special dark drink with Guinness and a menu that is all black food and the whole place is meant to look depressing.”

  Lara was shocked. She had been to the Depressed Poet a few times to see the open mic night. And she had sampled the mini black olive pizzas, though the black-dyed sauce had turned her stomach. “I see,” was all she could think of to say.

  Aunt Lynn returned with sweating glasses of sweet, thick tea. Kyle took a sip and beamed. “Always the best tea. I still remembering you would always make Lara and me tea when we would be studying together.”

  Aunt Lynn beamed back. “Well, thank you.”

  “Well, how are you, young man?” Uncle Joey strode in through the back door, holding a Bud Lite. He had been hanging out in his man cave and the familiar odor of the converted garage hung around him.

  “Very well, sir, how are you?”

  “Well I’m all right. I see Lynn is up to her old tricks, huh?” Uncle Joey gave Lara a half-sympathetic look.

  Lara rolled her eyes.

  “I just thought it would be a nice reunion after I saw Kyle with his momma at the store the other day. Say, how is Clarissa?”

  “Oh, Mom’s fine,” Kyle smiled.

  “Great! I always meant to catch up with her but I just haven’t been to the book club for a while.”

  “You two were in a book club?” Lara was incredulous. Kyle’s mom was a total perfectionist, from her hair to her white carpet, and certainly not the type to hang out with people like Aunt Lynn. She had her own ring of country club friends, perfect women like herself with lots of money. She had also always been rather disparaging toward Lara, and snide toward Lara’s family.