Zhànshì: A Dark Retelling Read online

  I gasp and stop moving my hands for a moment. Kuo hadn’t been a friend to me since I came here. He was a bit of a bully, but I wouldn’t have wished him ill. I don’t want any of the Yi Shu to die, especially in a a grizzly way.

  “Would they have tortured him like you did Shen?”

  “He’s a new recruit. They’d be aware he’d have known nothing about the intricate working of the Yi Shu. They wouldn’t have bothered torturing him…” Jaxon pauses.

  “What’s wrong?” I question, sliding from Jaxon’s back and sitting beside him. He turns on his side to face me and props his head up with his hand. The worry lines on his face have deepened, not lessened. “Jaxon?”

  “It’s been intimated that I was the one who killed the general. I’m the blond demon—it gives weight to the rumors of my power. However, Gaozu is worried. He sees you as a prized fighter and possibly the difference between defeat and victory. With your skills, I have to agree with him.”

  “I don’t understand,” I interrupt. Jaxon takes my hand and curls his large palm around my small fingers.

  “Kuo should have been present during the fight, but I don’t remember seeing him. It’s a sign he could have been hiding, and it might be the reason he was captured because he didn’t leave with the rest of our men. It’s not uncommon for the loudest mouths to be overcome with fear when the battle starts. What I don’t know is where he was hiding. If it was up on the hill, he might have seen certain events.”

  I swallow deeply, catching Jaxon’s meaning,

  “He might have seen me kill the general,” I state blankly, a fear rising within me.

  Jaxon nods his agreement.

  “And a desperate man will use anything as a bargaining tool. If he told Wang you were the person to kill the general, you’ll now have a target on your back as large if not larger than the one I already have on mine as the blond demon.”

  I slide from the bed, my hands shaking with fear. So much for staying hidden and fighting bravely until I could return home. I’ve put myself in danger and possibly given myself a death sentence. I start to pace across the floor. Candles illuminate the room around us. I take a few deep breaths and center myself in the way my father taught me as a child when I was worried about monsters under the bed. I can’t fear the future. Nothing is set in stone. I can change it with honor, truth, and justice.

  “It’s not something we need to worry about. I know I’m a target now, and I’ll use all my skills to protect myself against any threat.”

  “Lia, if he gets hold of you…if he finds out who you really are…”

  I hold my head up high. I won’t fear Wang. The moment I allow fear to win is the moment I’ll make myself vulnerable.

  “If he does, I’ll deal with it. I’m Lia Zhànshì, and I’ll bring honor to my family in everything I do.” I stand proudly at the side of the bed, and Jaxon watches me as I give my unwavering vow.

  “I’ve never met anyone like you. The skill of a thousand warriors, the bravery of gods, and all in one very sexy little package. You know what, I’ve been worrying all day because I’ve been seeing Wang come for Zhàn, but he isn’t—he’s going to get Lia, and it’ll be his downfall.”

  Jaxon slides forward, so he’s sitting on the edge of the bed, his eyes darkening as he looks me up and down. He pulls me in between his legs and undoes the cord of the dressing gown I’m wearing. It falls open to reveal my nakedness. At his gaze, the ever present heat floods my body and pools between my thighs.

  “Do you trust me, Lia?” he asks as he gets up from the bed and stands in front of me with his cock tented in his workout pants.

  “Always.” I look at him from under hooded eyes as the room fills with the scent of sexual need.

  He steps behind me, and removing my dressing gown from my body, he takes the cord, places my hands at my back, and ties my wrists together. I don’t move, and I don’t flinch when he pushes me onto the bed. My bottom is in the air, and my head is pressed against the mattress by his strong hand. I can’t see what he’s doing, but I feel his heat close to me. His tongue flicks onto my pussy, and I moan, long and loud. He licks the length of it before dipping his tongue inside me.

  “A perfect taste, sweet and seductive—my poison and elixir all rolled into one.”

  I don’t reply to him as he moves his tongue from my pussy to my puckered hole. I tense, but when he licks the sensitive flesh there, I relax. He moves back to my pussy and then back to my ass pushing his tongue into the hole. I trust him. I’ll accept whatever he’s decides to give me.

  Jaxon lets go of my head, undoes my wrists and pulls me up onto all fours on the bed. I feel his heat leave my body, but I’m comforted a few moments later when his pants are thrown onto the floor beside the bed. His presence returns, and I feel his hard cock at the entrance to my core. He pushes himself inside me, and I receive him with a lust filled moan. I wish I could see him, but the anticipation of what he’ll do next tingles wildly over my skin. He pulls back out before slamming hard into me. He grabs my hips and holds them tightly, his fingers digging into the curved flesh. He’ll bruise me with his strength, but I don’t care. I welcome the marks. They show me I’m human and still a woman even though I live and fight as a man. It’s ironic—I thought I wore a mask as a woman, but it’s as a man I’m truly hidden.

  “Stay relaxed.” Jaxon leans over me and kisses the back of my shoulder.

  I long for him to mark the flesh of my neck, bite me, savor me, but I can’t risk it being seen. I shut my eyes and allow the feeling to take over. Jaxon moves one of his hands from my hips, and I feel him tease at the entrance of my puckered hole. Instinct has me tense, but a few thrusts from Jaxon’s cock inside my pussy focuses my mind only on the pleasure he can give me. I relax my body as an orgasm builds deep within me. Jaxon teases my hole again and pushes his finger in. It’s big and feels uncomfortable but blissful at the same time. I take quick breaths to maintain my composure, especially when Jaxon joins the first finger with a second.

  “So full,” I whimper, a fine sheen of sweat breaking out over my skin with the exertion of trying to control my body.

  “Wait until you’re ready for my cock there. I’m going to take every hole you have and mark them as mine.”

  “They’ve always been yours, Jaxon.”

  He’s already had my pussy and mouth. My ass will be next, I’ve no doubt, and I’ll welcome him there too. I want him to claim me everywhere.

  Jaxon moves his hips again and starts to thrust hard into me while his fingers in my ass move in and out. I can barely think as my orgasm hits me. My body jerks and shudders of its own accord. Jaxon buries himself deep inside me and fills me with his release. I relish it and what it means—his love for me.

  Jaxon leans over me,

  “I love you, Lia.”

  “I love you too,” I reply, exhaustion finally hitting me from the exertion of the past few days.

  Jaxon withdraws his fingers, and I wince. His cock follows next, and I collapse down onto the bed, my eyes fluttering shut. He fetches a wet cloth from the bathroom and tenderly washes between my thighs before disposing of the cloth and pulling me into his arms.

  “I’ll set an alarm because I want to get back to the compound before any of the others wake up, but I just want to hold you for a few more hours.”

  I nod, my body too tired to speak.

  Jaxon kisses the top of my head, and as he settles to sleep, the darkness claims me but not before a thought hits me—a way to defeat the Jīn Long forever. I just hope Gaozu will accept it because it’s going to be risky, and it might just break me.

  Everyone files into the main throne room of the compound. It’s not as elaborate as the one I first met Gaozu in, all those years ago. He still owns that house, but he spends very little time there, preferring to stay as close to the action as possible while he’s working to make a better life for our people. It allows him to be at the epicenter of everything, just as he is at the moment in this room. The entire
population of the compound has been called for the meeting. I don’t know what it entails, but I can’t shake the bad feeling sitting in the pit of my stomach.

  “You have any idea what this is about?” another of the older recruits asks me.

  I shrug my shoulders and search out Lia in the crowd of people. I eventually locate her with her section of the recruits. She’s standing ramrod straight, staring forward, just like the others are.

  I take my position at the front of the assembled crowd, my arms straight by my side in attention. We all fall silent when Gaozu appears on the platform in front of us. For a lot of the people in this room, it’s the first time they’ve seen him, including Lia, who has only seen him in disguise. He’s wearing a traditional Chinese emperor’s outfit today. He looks like a King. Everyone bows low as he takes his seat on his throne. It’s little more than a soft chair, but it still has the statue of the phoenix next to it to demonstrate his power.

  “Thank you.” He motions for us all to straight up again. “Welcome, everyone. I apologize for not greeting you all sooner but know I have been walking among you, and I’ve seen the good work you’ve been doing. I’m proud of each and every one of you.”

  Gaozu falls silent and looks my way. It’s an odd look, and one I can’t read. I cock my head at him, but he turns away and focuses back on the other soldiers. I glance briefly over my shoulder to where Lia is standing. She’s staring straight ahead, though, and doesn’t meet my gaze. A sinking feeling settles in my stomach.

  Gaozu continues, “Something has been brought to my attention, and it needs to be addressed here today. Yesterday a body was returned to us by the Jīn Long. It belonged to one of our new recruits who was killed by our enemy, and he may have told some of our secrets to his captors before he met a violent death. We can’t be certain of this, but I want you all to be aware of a possible new target for the Jīn—their general’s killer.” Most of the assembled crowd turn to look at Lia while I bow my head and shut my eyes. I’ve still got a sinking feeling. “I want all ears to the ground, listening out for rumors concerning this matter.”

  Gaozu stands up from his throne and make his way across the platform before descending the steps at the side. With my head bowed, I step forward to meet him. He acknowledges me and positions himself beside me, so his mouth is close to my ear and can’t be seen by the assembled crowd.

  “Trust and honor. Keep them in your heart, Jaxon, because with what’s about to happen, you’ll need them. Remember, sometimes silence is the best course of action,” he mouths to me in an almost inaudible whisper.

  “What?” I reply in the same hushed tone.

  “Trust and honor, Jaxon.”

  Gaozu moves away from me, and I stand rooted to the floor, confused. What the hell is he talking about? What’s about to happen? Eventually, my senses return to me, and I follow behind him as he walks along the lines of recruits. When he stops in front of, Lia, I try to suppress the gasp in my throat and the sweat on my hands.

  Lia bows her head.

  “Zhàn, son of Lin Zhànshì?” Gaozu questions.

  “Yes, sir,” Lia responds.

  “Are you aware you’ve now become a target because of the bravery you showed?”

  “I am, sir. I won’t shy away from my duty, though. I’ll continue to serve the Yi Shu as I did before. I’ll not let the Jīn’s threats stop me.”

  Gaozu nods. “You are brave. I remember your father well. He’s a good man, and an excellent fighter. I wish I could clone him to create an army to defend us, then everyone else could go home. But alas, people grow old. They get injured. It was a sad day when your father had to return home.”

  Lia bows her head but doesn’t respond.

  “He was a loyal and courageous member of the Yi Shu, and someone I considered to be a friend. I remember accompanying him to your home on the day he retired as a thank you for his service. I wanted to bestow the honor on him to give him something he would remember for a long time afterward.”

  Gaozu turns to me. He smiles, but it doesn’t quite reach the corners of his mouth. There’s a sadness emanating from him in powerful waves. I’ve never seen anything like it before. It hits me hard in the chest, and it feels as though I stumble back even though my feet are rooted firmly to the floor.

  The world is turning on its axis. It’s slowly rotating inexorably toward something I’m not sure I can stop.

  Trust and honor.

  “I remember the day vividly.” Gaozu returns his attention to Lia. “He was proud to introduce me to his family. His wife and two daughters, Lia and Lán.” The tone of Gaozu’s voice turns dark. “But there was no son. He didn’t have one.”

  A collective gasp sounds around the room, and Lia’s eyes go wide. Her mouth moves but no words come out.

  “I was not lucky enough to be there that day.” Eventually, she finds her voice. “I was away at school.”

  Gaozu nods as if he believes her words. I know better, though. He’s not a fool. You can’t lie to him. I tried it once when I was younger. He asked me if I was planning to avenge my parents’ death. I told him my loyalty was to the Yi Shu, and I assured him I wouldn’t waste my talent on something as futile as revenge. I was lying, though, and he knew it. He was already aware of the research into my family history I’d been collating in my room. I could see by the look on his face he didn’t believe me, even before he confronted me with the truth. I was made to run the assault course for a whole twenty-four hours that day. I’ve never lied to him since. Well, not until Lia came into my life.

  Betrayal inflicts a deep wound to a man like Gaozu. I’m beginning to suspect I won’t survive this day, and I’m taking my last few breaths.

  Silence is the best course of action.

  Gaozu steps closer to Lia. He’s much taller than her and looks down at her.

  “Lin Zhànshì does not have a son. He’s never had a son and will never have a son. So, I have to ask, who and what are you? A traitor?”

  Lia takes a step back, retreating from Gaozu’s anger. It’s the first sign of weakness I’ve ever seen in her. I want to say something, but Gaozu’s words repeat in my head. Silence is the best course of action. There is more going on here than I know about. I have to trust my instincts and remain silent. I have to trust in the man who taught me and in the woman I love. I keep my back ramrod straight and look down at Lia with the pretense of fury on my face.

  “Remove your scarf,” Gaozu orders. Lia doesn’t move. “Are you Jīn?” my leader shouts his question.

  “No, sir, never. I’m a loyal Yi Shu,” Lia insists.

  I don’t know how much more of this I can witness. What’s happening?

  Silence is the best course of action.

  Silence is the best course of action.

  Silence is the best course of action.

  I repeat the phrase continually in my head, bile churning in my stomach.

  “Then it leaves me with only one alternative,” Gaozu states flatly before reaching forward and pulling the scarf from Lia’s head. Her shoulder-length hair is revealed, and the woman I love is recognizable in the young face looking back at us. “What is your name, girl?”

  Lia looks around at all the other men in the room before stepping forward. Her back is straight, her head held high.

  “My name is Lia Zhànshì. I’m the daughter of Lin Zhànshì. He’s too old and too badly injured to fight for the Yi Shu. It would mean his certain death. When the first male rule was invoked, I stole away from my home in the dead of night, and having disguised myself as a boy, I presented myself at the training camp in his place to save him. He knew nothing of my plan.”

  Lia’s voice shows no hint of the distress I know she must be suffering. It was her greatest fear to be discovered.

  She continues, “I came here and brought honor to my family when I killed Wang’s general. I am a better fighter than many men here. This is a modern world we’re trying to create. We are all equals, and I will continue to be equal no ma
tter what punishment you choose for me.”

  Lia’s passionate speech draws a few gasps from those watching. She’s vehement, and I know she won’t back down. She’s right about one thing—she’s one of the best fighters here.

  Gaozu doesn’t flinch at her verbal attack. He stands frozen to the spot waiting for her to finish.

  Silence is the best course of action.

  Silence is the best course of action.

  Silence is the best course of action.

  I repeat the phrase in my head again and again to remind myself not to react. I’d better get a fucking explanation of what’s going on soon, though, because the woman I love has a death sentence hanging over her head now.

  “Lia, you’ve proved yourself to be a brave and skilled fighter.” Gaozu looks sad. “But what you’ve done is wrong. It goes against our rules and breaking them must have consequences. There can be no exceptions.”

  Gaozu turns toward the platform and slowly heads back to his throne as if he’s carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. Neither Lia nor I move. We both stare at each other, and then watch as Gaozu takes his seat and places his head in his hands.

  “I thought we’d found the one to bring us victory against the Jīn Long, but I fear your presence here will only lead to our defeat.” Gaozu sighs. “Jaxon, bring me the sword at the girl’s waist.”

  Lia’s mouth quivers. I don’t move at first. I just stare at her.

  “Please,” she mouths, her hand going to the sword.

  For a moment, I think she’s going to stop me taking it, but she doesn’t. Instead, she removes it from the scabbard and hands it to me.

  “Trust and honor,” she mouths, and it’s then I realize that she and Gaozu are in this together.

  I begin to wonder if he’s always known who she is, even when I didn’t? I rip the sword from her hands. I don’t like being kept in the dark, even though I’m sure it’s for a purpose. I take the sword up onto the platform and give it to Gaozu with a bow of my head. My nostrils are flaring, and he can tell I’m pissed off.

  He ignores me, though, and stands,