Camouflaged Hearts Anthology Read online

  "Ethan? Is that you?” I called.

  "Em, I brought you a horse. Let's take a ride.” His voice was full of a confidence I hadn't heard from him before. I squinted through the darkness to see the shadow of two horses below in the garden, one with a rider. Still, I hesitated.

  "Tell Rose you're coming, if it would make you feel better. I promise to be good,” he urged.

  I smiled down at him, hoping he could see my face. “Not too good, though. Right?” I teased.

  "Only as good as you want me to be, but you can tell Rose I've come to take you for a ride into town. You're a grown woman. She won't be put out by it."

  I nodded and reached for my cardigan.

  Seeing Ethan again, had a strangely calming effect on my tense body. It was as if I knew instinctively that my body was his for the taking and it had decided to wait patiently.

  Rose didn't have a problem with Ethan taking me out. She adored him and held him in the highest respect both as a man and as her employer. I think she was a little infatuated with him herself. She told me I was perfectly safe in his company. How little she knew. My heart was anything but safe in his hands.

  Once he'd helped me mount the mare, we led the horses down the drive and along the main road.

  "I hope you don't mind my coming for you,” he began.

  "Of course not."

  He glanced at me. “You weren't in bed?"

  "Almost, but I wasn't undressed yet.” I thought that made him blush a little but I couldn't see his face well enough in the dark.

  "I enjoy being with you, Em. I feel as if I've always known you,” he said quietly.

  I cleared my throat, a little unsure of how to respond. “I feel that way too, Ethan,” I said honestly. “I'm really glad you're the one who met me at the station. This stay with Rose could have been the worst thing for my life right now, if you hadn't been here."

  Ethan led the horses to a creek just north of town. There, he tied the horses loosely to a tree so they could drink. He helped me down and swung me into his arms. This time, his kiss was gentle. Instead of making me throb, it melted my insides. He wrapped his arms around my back and slowly drew me closer to him. I complied, closed my eyes and allowed my body to assume a languid state so that it moulded into his solid curves.

  His erection was hard on my thigh, yet he made no move to alleviate any discomfort he must have been feeling. All of his focus seemed to be on me.

  When he broke the kiss and my eyes flickered open, he was watching me, his eyelids heavy and with a smile on his lips.

  "That was nice,” I whispered. “More than nice."

  "I'm glad. I just wanted you to know that I'm not the kind of man who will take any woman he can have. And you're not any woman."

  My heart fluttered just a bit. My lips parted yet no words formed in my mind.

  "I'm glad you came here, Em. I like being with you, and I'll be here for anything you need. If that's a man in your bed, I'm ready."

  "There's nowhere else I'd rather be right now than with you,” I told him sincerely.

  We rode back to the cottage in silence. It was almost as if he were apologising for his ardour in the barn, but I didn't think that was it. He wasn't the kind of man to apologise for what he was feeling. Could it be he simply wanted me to know that he was there for me, in all respects? I wondered how long my heart could take being spoiled by Ethan Graham.

  * * * *

  The following night was uncommonly humid, threatening a storm. I hadn't seen Ethan since our ride the night before. Despite our conversation, it was as if he was hiding from me. I wouldn't have blamed him. What kind of woman was I, who would sleep with an RAF pilot when my own was still missing? I'm sure that's what was going through his head. I know, because it was going through mine. When I was with Ethan, there was nothing in the world that was important. My thoughts and feelings revolved around him. Then, later, when I was alone, all my guilt and insecurities would surface once again.

  I went down to the river, which wound its way alongside the cottage and behind the farm. Lined with willow trees and soft mosses, it was a wondrous place. I'd been only once before on one of my walks with Hermione. Fairies could have been living there, among the flowing branches, and I wouldn't have been surprised.

  I smoothed my skirt under my bottom and sat in the moss to watch the river meander through the woods. The scent was heavenly, all earth and cleanliness. I breathed it in as deeply as I could.

  My gaze lingered on the far bank. When a man surfaced from beneath the soft, rippling of the water, my eyes widened. He was brown from the sun right down to his white buttocks that shone with perfection in the blue twilight. He reached up to run his fingers through his wet hair and the muscles in his back that tapered down to his lean waist flexed and moved with a grace I'd never seen.

  When his profile came into view, it confirmed what I already knew. I was watching Ethan wash the dirt from his body after a day of working the farm. As he climbed the opposite bank, I couldn't tear my gaze from the dark mass hanging heavy between his legs. It came into view with every step before disappearing again. When he turned fully, completely nude in the glimmering, ethereal light, he could have been otherworldly himself, a being sent from the stars to please my eyes. His chest was smooth but a dark trail of hair spread from his navel deep into his groin where it nested his cock. It twitched and I looked up, the spell broken.

  By the time I realised he was watching me, it was too late. I'd been staring for quite some time. Determined not to look a fool, I inhaled deeply, met his gaze and gave him a coy smile. His cheeks reddened, giving me confidence.

  "See something you like?” he asked, his gaze dark. Even though he was perhaps fifty feet from me, each detail of his speech, his body and his expression was vividly detailed.

  I stood, dusting off my behind. “I see something I want, but there's a river between us,” I said with as much sensuality as I could manage in my needy state. I was essentially throbbing, inside and out. Having him inside me was the only thing that would sate the need.

  He remained quiet for a moment, then, dropped the shirt he'd picked up and dove back into the water. Holding his breath as his lithe body slid just below the surface, he seemed a nymph god, completely at home in his underwater world. If I'd had a camera, it would have been the perfect picture.

  When he emerged and took a deep, cleansing breath, a smile lit his face. “See, nothing to it. Can't let a river come between us, can we?"

  So, he'd changed his mind about our relationship? Was that what he was telling me? A shiver rippled through my body. He climbed from the water, naked and shining. Taking hold of my shoulders, Ethan leaned closer. He kissed me hard, with no hesitation, no tentative probing, as I would have expected of our first time together. His body, hard and wet, pressed against mine and I momentarily wondered how I would explain wet clothing to Rose if she weren't yet asleep when I returned home. No matter. I didn't intend on returning to the cottage any time soon.

  Ethan was hard and insistent. He laid me back on the ground, looming over me with lust rippling over him.

  The sensation of soft moss tickling my back forced me to writhe, creating a bed for my body. The writhing motion of my hips added to his ardour. I was a petite woman but my curves were lush and feminine. He knew I was watching him, but he couldn't take his eyes off my skin. Slowly, he brushed aside my blouse, revealing my pert, soft breasts. His fingers trailed languidly around the outer curves eliciting a shiver from deep within me. He glanced at my face. I closed my eyes, my lips slightly parted and from the heat, I knew my cheeks were flushed.

  If he slipped his hand beneath the waistband of my skirt, he'd find me ready for him. It seemed I was always ready for him, no matter the time of day or circumstances. He roused in me, sensations I'd never before experienced.

  "I don't just want the sex, Em. I want to make you mine,” he breathed as he focused his attention on my curves. He leaned closer and nuzzled my neck, nipping at my earlobe
. Where his palm rested on my breast, he felt my long inhalation.

  I couldn't answer him just then. I had no idea what to say, so I left it at that. He'd made it clear that any intimacy between us wouldn't be without emotion on his part, however, I didn't know what it would be for me.

  I reached up and took hold of his biceps as he moved overtop of me. He was achingly hard as I raked my hands down his back. He straightened for a brief moment to take me in. Immediately, my hands went for his chest where they played with his dusting of hair. He lowered his body so that my warmth heated his skin and my breasts cushioned his chest. Rubbing himself against my thigh in gentle circles, he let out a gasp when I reached down to cup him in my palm. His balls were heavy and big. I moved to use both hands so that I could knead him gently. He inhaled deeply when I slowly tugged before reaching for his waist.

  Ethan took my head in his hands and kissed me deeply.

  "You taste of warmth, of life and ... cinnamon,” he said.

  I laughed. “Cinnamon buns for breakfast,” I whispered.

  I wrapped my full lips around his tongue and he allowed me to suck and pull as he pressed his shaft against my damp folds. I gasped as his cock touched my tingling skin and within seconds he was buried to the hilt within me. He stretched me, filled me until I could no longer speak. A thousand sensations broke over me before he could even begin his own rhythm. The wetness of his skin smelled of rain, his cold body warming quickly over mine, the rapid breathing close to my ear and the explosion of light in front of my eyes, as my nipples met his chest, blended with the night sounds of the river and the incoming clouds.

  From his expression, I knew this was going to be over faster than he'd anticipated. He withdrew but when I whimpered in protest against his ear, he repositioned himself and thrust hard. There was nothing I wanted more and as I forced myself to relax in order to accept all of him, he slowly slid deeper.

  He seemed to hit all the right spots and as he moved within me, I convulsed against him, throwing my legs around his lean waist. Before my closed eyes, pinpricks of light danced in circles. I could have lain there all night, just like that, without him even moving, but there was more to come.

  Panting now, he reverted to an instinctual rhythm. This was so much different than any night I'd spent with Will. Then, it had been for comfort, for companionship. This time, as I clenched my muscles tightly around his shaft, it was for pure pleasure. I was his in that moment, and I'd fight to remember it for the rest of my life.

  With the pressure inside me building, he thrust his hands beneath my bottom, angling me so that he entered deeply. I moaned despite the fact that I was pinned under most of his body weight. I tossed my head as he bent to nip my collarbone. His thrusts were insistent, as if he had been waiting a lifetime for this moment. All his pent up emotions raged through him and into me. I lifted my knees. He grasped behind them and groaned as he continued to sate his long pent-up lust.

  The deeper penetration and the new position sent waves of electricity shooting through my system. I arched beneath him, my body no longer under my control. Inside, I was a throbbing entity, milking him for what I needed. I came hard, my muscles tight as my body begged him to come with me. I knew my fingernails were biting his shoulders but I couldn't have done a thing to stop.

  He rode me over the crest and as he gazed into my eyes, I felt the beautiful floating sensation as I came back to earth.

  He straightened then and I bit my lip when he swelled inside me, knowing the end was near. Stretching so that his chest was above my face, he almost lost control when I took his nipple into my mouth. That was it. He thrust hard as if not wanting to be without the tight warmth holding him inside me. Then, without warning, every muscle in his body clenched, his shaft pulsed with release and he emptied inside me.

  I pulled him down on top of me before he could give any thought to his weight. I bore all of him, keeping my legs wrapped tightly around him and God, did I love him on top of me.

  For a moment he stayed that way until he noticed my breathing becoming shallow. It didn't bother me in the slightest but he slid to my side, pulling me against him. My eyes were closed now and he laid a kiss on one eyelid bringing a peaceful smile to my face.

  * * * *

  Still shuddering with lust and serenity, the cold rain landed in my eye. For a moment, I thought it must be drops from his hair, but he was relaxed, his head beside mine, our bodies still joined.

  The first bolt of lightning blinded me and I saw spinning circles of light until I rubbed at my eyes. The subsequent thunder had Ethan pulling from me and sitting upright. I watched him as he gazed at the sky, a worried expression on his face.

  "Do you think he's angry?” he asked.

  "Who?” I whispered, thinking he might mean William, as the rain cooled my now exposed belly.

  "The man upstairs.” He rubbed at his forehead.

  That surprised me. “I didn't know you were religious,” I said.

  "Only sometimes.” He smiled at me, and I realised how serious he took our situation. He honestly didn't want me to be cheating on Will, nor did he want to disgrace Will's memory by screwing his fiancée so soon after his death.

  I rubbed the arm he was leaning on, hoping to offer some comfort. If he thought what we'd done was wrong, I wasn't sure I could live with the thought that I'd seduced him, no matter how bad I'd wanted it.

  "Like right now?” I asked.

  He didn't answer me. “We'd better get inside."

  Another bolt of lightning tore across the now-black sky, leaving tinges of red and purple in its wake. The thunder seemed to shake the trees. I grabbed my panties and straightened the rest of my clothes.

  "Good idea,” I said, now more fearful than just a moment earlier. The dark sky seemed to be rolling and the rain was pelting.

  "We'll get to the barn,” he suggested. “It's closer."

  He stood and reached down his hand to help me up. I slipped on my panties, hastily grabbing for my other clothes. Cradling them against my breast, I ran hand in hand with Ethan toward the dark shadow of the barn.

  Inside the barn, it was as dark as my bedroom in London with the blackout curtains drawn. Here, they were required as well, only the citizens of Pond Hollow were usually tucked in bed before they needed any electric lights. Well, Rose was anyway. I suppose I can't speak for the other residents.

  As Ethan moved around the barn, seeming to know what he was looking for, I stood still, afraid of running into something or tripping over some farm implement. The soft movement of the few calves, rustling straw as they slept in their stalls, gave a comforting sound to a building that otherwise would have been full of eerie creaks and cold drafts. It was anything but cold, which was good because we were both dripping wet. Dying of pneumonia wasn't on my list of to-do items.

  Ethan returned to me, skimming his strong hand over my shoulder before escorting me to a stack of hay at the north end of the barn. Here, he layered the blankets he'd collected. Together, we snuggled deep inside and simply lay in each other's arms. I couldn't remember ever feeling this way with Will. He had been practical where Ethan was obviously impulsive and romantic. But no, I didn't want to think of Will. He was dead.

  "I want to marry you, Emmy,” he said out of the darkness.

  I froze and held my breath. “No, you don't.” Not again, I thought with a sense of resignation.

  His arms tightened their hold on me. “I know we barely know each other, but don't you hear stories about people knowing when it's right?” I moved to speak but he shushed me. “Emmy. I know you're grieving, but there is time for us."

  I took a deep breath. “And when you get called into service again? When your leave is over? What happens to me then? I'm not sure I can handle it again, Ethan."

  "We can deal with that when the time comes,” he said impulsively.

  I turned toward him, my lips brushing his jaw line. “Ethan, listen to me. I don't want to be a waiting wife. I didn't want it before Will left and
I don't want it now. I didn't know you were a pilot when I first met you. You drew me in under false pretences."

  He laughed, his whole body shaking around me. “I did nothing of the sort. I believe it was you who seduced me."

  "All right,” I said on a sigh. “You're right. I did. I'd missed that sort of comfort so much. Can you see that? I won't apologise. I'd do it all over again in an instant."

  "I don't expect you to,” he said with a wistful tone in his voice. “It's just that I've waited so long to find the right woman for me. I've never married just because a local girl took a fancy to me, but somehow, it just feels right with you. I've only known you for a few days, but...” He didn't finish.

  I couldn't tell him I felt the same. The ghost of William was too nearby as was the prospect of my own self being lost once again. Being married, waiting for a fighter pilot, it was all so depressing, so much like living under a wet blanket. I couldn't let it start again.

  "I want you Ethan. But I don't want to be married. I've been there and it nearly destroyed me.” His smile disappeared. “I'll be here for you if you need me when you return. I'll be here for this, but not as a wife.” I turned in his arms toward him. “And I can't guarantee there won't be others."

  The words hurt as soon as they came out. The tension in his muscles and his silence told me I'd wounded him, but the sting in my throat and the clutch of my chest was completely unexpected. The fact was, I didn't want others. I wanted him, here, time and time again. But, I didn't want him holding out for me. I was afraid it would be just as tortuous for him as it would be for me. Was that supposed to be part of life? The torture? I hoped not, but it was starting to seem inescapable. What did I know? All I knew was that I didn't want him missing out on his life because he was worried about me.

  "Say something, Ethan."

  He cleared his throat. “I'm sorry. I wasn't expecting that. This is a small town. I assumed your want of me indicated the possibility of a prolonged relationship."