Justice for Leanne Read online

  “A soul weigher? Right, the scales that I carry for you. I know that.”

  “No Leanne. Not the scales themselves. I gave you the scales, and told you they were what you needed, because you had been human at one time. It was easier for you to comprehend and do what I needed you to do with the scales. They gave you a frame of reference for what was going on. It was hard enough for you to realize you were no longer dead, and that you would walk on the mortal plain forever helping me. Instead of explaining this to you when you were first given to me, I gave you the scales.”

  “Right. I love those scales by the way. They always make me feel confident in the verdict. Sometimes when I’m leaning personally one way or the other, and the scales let me know that my instinct is pretty good. In fact, I have never disagreed with the scales.” Leanne leaned into his side as she pondered the scales. “I actually find that interesting now that I think about. Not once in three hundred years have the scales and my intuition ever been in opposition.”

  * * * *

  Justice sighed. Either she was being deliberately stubborn about this, or he wasn’t doing a good job of explaining. “No darling, not interesting. That is what I am trying to tell you. You are the dusa skala. You are the soul weigher. I gave you the scales to help you comprehend better, but they are nothing more than a prop; they weigh nothing. When you were chosen and the Higher gods agreed, you became the dusa skala. You are the scales for the souls. You were perfect for it, and the Higher gods could see that.”

  Justice paused to search Leanne’s eyes, not sure what he was hoping to find but knowing he would recognize it if he saw it. “You see everything in such shades of grey; there is no absolute right or wrong for you. This made you the perfect dusa skala. You are able to look into the souls of those who try to come forward, seeing whether they fall into the safe side of the grey, or the dangerous side. You make the choice using the inner strength and belief that that resides in your soul. You are also tied to me this way forever. I know that I’ve told you when you were no longer able to carry the scales you would fade. But in reality, you will forever have this ability because it isn’t the scales, it is you. You and I can be together for all eternity.”

  He had felt her inching away from him throughout his explanation. She looked at him with those wide deep amethyst eyes that could see through to the very soul; which had in fact been magicked by him to do so.

  She was staring at him with an almost frightened panicked look in her eyes. He was prepared for anger, not for panic. Let her yell and scream. If she panicked, he wouldn’t know how to help her.

  “Wha…wha…what do you mean I weigh their souls. That is not possible. It is the scales.” Leanne sounded like she was scared and not able to really understand what he had just told her. Justice knew that it was a great responsibility, he had borne it for a while. He just had to get through to her that she was doing her job and doing it well. She didn’t look like she wanted to hear that from him right now though.

  “It has to be the scales. There is no way I can be the soul weigher.” She started scooting away from him on the couch as far as she could, he didn’t think Leanne even felt it when she fell to the ground. Feeling helpless, he watched with his heart being torn to shreds as she continued to back away, scooting on the floor toward the far corner of the room, feeling safest there; tucked away from what he was trying to tell her.

  He listened as she spoke to herself. “I can’t be responsible. I would have known. This is not what I wanted. I killed myself so I wouldn’t be responsible anymore. I don’t want this. Why did he do this to me?”

  Chapter Six

  Faith came running up the stairs from the bakery at the panicked mental plea Justice had sent to her. She came through the door in a rush to find a scene unlike any she’d seen before it.

  Leanne had backed into a corner of the room, repeating something softly to herself. Justice was pacing back and forth as he tried to talk to Leanne. But if he got too close, she tried to crawl even further into the corner.

  Faith was shocked. She had not expected this reaction from Leanne. Faith had known Leanne the entire three hundred years of her new life; in all that time, the girl had been tough and fought all her demons and battles head on and with an angry stride. Leanne wasn’t prone to meltdowns.

  This was going to take all of Faith’s skills, and she was going to have to get Justice to trust her and leave the mortal plain for a bit. He was looking haggard anyway, so hopefully she could convince him to go to Prya. Even though she had been banished for what felt like forever, Faith could remember the feel of Prya and the instant sense of quiet that gods felt when they had been away for too long. Justice needed that peace right now.

  “Justice,” she said softly to get his attention, as he hadn’t acknowledged that she was in the room.

  “Faith,” Justice looked up as she said his name, “Please, you have to help me. I’m not sure what happened. We were talking and I explained about the dusa skala, and this is what she did.”

  “Do you know anything of her existence prior to when you saved her?” Faith feared that somehow Justice had triggered a memory that had panicked Leanne.

  “No,” Justice seemed anguished when he realized he knew nothing of Leanne prior to when she was given to him. Faith knew that he loved the girl, but he needed to take a hard look at what he had been doing the last three hundred years with her. If he hadn’t even taken the time to get to know her, then how did he expect Leanne to believe his expression of love? Faith could see that there was a lot of work still to be done with them.

  Faith could hear the anguish in his voice, it was scratchy and he seemed to not really know what to say as he asked, “Please, what are we going to do? You have to help me get her back.”

  “You need to trust me, Justice. Go back to Prya.” She held up a hand to forestall the argument she could see him getting ready to give her. “Please. I can help her, but you need to give us some time alone. When she comes back from her trips to the woods, it sometimes takes me two hours to restore her to equal balance. It isn’t that she can’t do it herself, it’s that she doesn’t trust herself or have enough faith in her ability to do it.”

  Her words hurt, that was clear to see; but Faith hoped Justice could see her point.

  “I did this to her though.” Faith had to strain to hear the words spoken so softly.

  “Most people believe in themselves and lack faith in those around them, but Leanne is different. She believes in others and in their ability to do good, but she does not ever trust she makes the right decisions. For you to tell her she is the only reason those souls have been put back into Hell, has sent her somewhere into her past. I am going to have to work with her, to show her that she has to believe in herself; that she wouldn’t have been chosen to be the dusa skala if she wasn’t the only one who could do it. For that I need you to be gone. Not only are you upsetting her, but when she settles down and comes out of this panicked state, you will distract her from being able to become whole again.”

  “When can I come back? Please Faith, I need to be with her. Seeing her like this, knowing I did this, it’s tearing me up inside.”

  “You can come back tomorrow morning, when it is time to go into the forest. In the meantime, work on getting some sleep and back into the man she knows you are. If you don’t, you won’t be able to help her in the morning.”

  “I can’t just leave her Faith. I don’t really know who she was, but in the past three hundred years, I have come to care about who she is. Please, how am I supposed to just go?” Justice sighed and finally agreed, “You’ll call for me if she gets worse, or if I need to go see the Higher gods? Please, Faith.”

  Although she was disgusted with Justice for mentioning the Higher gods, she agreed to get him out of her hair. “If she needs you, I will call immediately, but do not think to involve the Higher gods in this. They will take her from you. I know this.”

  Faith watched as Justice approached Leanne, but Lean
ne chanted faster and tried to avoid him.

  “Sweetheart, Faith is here to help now. I’m going to leave now and I’ll see you in the morning for work.” He looked down at her, thinking he saw her stumble in her litany.

  That was a start.

  He popped himself out of her apartment and into Prya.

  * * * *

  Faith sat in a chair next to Leanne, and leaned back.

  She sang a lullaby, a song that had been taught to her on the mortal plain when she first was banished. Because of her banishment, Faith missed her family and friends. Although in her heart she knew that she had done the right thing, the loneliness sometimes got overwhelming.

  One of her first customers had been a young man named Spero. He had taught her the lullaby, sensing her loneliness. He was the only person who had taken the time to talk to her when she first opened the bakery. The people of Brimstone didn’t mind helping those who were passing through, but they didn’t take easily to newcomers who were here to stay.

  The song that Spero had taught her when he passed through had made her feel connected to someone. She always thought of him and his smile when she sang the song. Sometimes, if she sang the song right before she fell asleep, she would dream of him.

  Leanne had settled down, Faith knew it was time to move forward.

  “Come on out of the corner now, honey. He’s gone. We can sit and talk for the rest of the evening, then you can decide whether or not you are going to be mad or just pretend to be for a bit,” Faith spoke in a soft voice, knowing Leanne was still very fragile.

  Faith watched as Leanne looked around to make sure it was just the two of them. Leanne had to come to the realization that this was who and what she was now; it wouldn’t be an easy process. Faith was glad she could be there for her friend.

  “Oh sweetheart, don’t cry.” Faith’s heart broke at the look on Leanne’s face. “You are fine. Justice is an ass, and right now he is a worried ass. I had to practically drag him out of here myself. He was threatening to go the Higher gods if you weren’t going to be okay. I’m going to let him know you’ve moved from the corner so he relaxes a little and doesn’t start calling on people none of us want involved in something this insignificant.” Faith closed her eyes to send a message to Justice. When she opened them, she saw Leanne had taken the few minutes to get herself a Kleenex and was trying to get control of her breathing.

  “I’m so sorry about my reaction. I’m not even sure why this caused such a reaction. Except…” Leanne sighed. “Of all the things he could’ve said, that was probably the absolute worst. Long before Justice brought me into his care, my judgment got people killed. It was actually what drove me to death in the first place. Now he tells me my judgment continues to send people to their death. I couldn’t live with myself if I’d made a mistake, and in fact chose not to live with it the last time. Now I will have no choice, but beyond that I won’t know if I am really right. What if I am wrong and I release a soul that will hurt someone, or even worse what if the soul should be released and I send it back to Hell?” Leanne turned her tear stained face toward her friend as she looked at her with pleading eyes.

  Faith stood and walked over to Leanne, she put her arms around her, hugging her. “Honey, every time you come back from a day of weighing souls, we go through this. You are great at your job, because this is what you were created for. You always said the scales do their job, and you simply read them. How many times have I told you that you should have more belief in yourself? You always said that you listen to your gut first and then look at the scales. In that all time, tell me, has your gut ever disagreed with the scales? Think back, Leanne and tell me. Ever?”

  Faith could see Leanne was thinking about the souls she had dealt with. Leanne pulled out of her arms. “I don’t think so. I think I’ve always agreed with what the scales.”

  “Can I tell you why?” Faith didn’t want to scare her friend anymore, but she knew that she needed to hear this. There couldn’t be any more secrets from her, especially if Justice truly wanted a relationship.

  “Are you asking if I’m going to freak out again? No, I think I have it under control. After all, it isn’t like I can handle two breakdowns in a days.”

  “In that case, let’s get some tea and settle in for a night of girl talk.”

  Faith could see Leanne smile and nod her head in agreement. “You know, I believe I can go for that. I’ll head in to make that tea, you stoke the fire. Just wave a finger filled with magick and get it roaring. When I come back we can get the heavy stuff out of the way and then you can tell me about the song you were singing. It seems to me I’ve heard it somewhere before. Let me think on that while I make the tea.”

  Faith heard Leanne sigh as she walked into the kitchen.

  * * * *

  Justice wasn’t getting anywhere sitting around and worrying about Leanne, but until he had heard from Faith he had been unable to do anything else. He was thankful that she had let him know that Leanne was out of the corner and coherent again. He knew that Faith hadn’t had to talk to him but she had, for that he was grateful.

  He looked around his apartment as he got up to find something to do. It was so sterile. There were no pictures and everything was white, colorless. He really didn’t spend a lot of time here, instead he tried to spend all his time at Leanne’s where there was color and the apartment felt lived in.

  As he went into the kitchen, Justice realized that he preferred Leanne’s apartment to his own. He had been spending so much time on the mortal plain that he felt more comfortable there, as long as he had Leanne.

  As he looked around, he thought he could hear her. Indulging in a fantasy he imagined he could see her. Her sweater fell straight around her as she leaned against the counter, waiting for the water to boil. Her face was relaxed, not like when he had left. There were traces of tears on her cheeks and she looked tired. To him, she had never looked better. Focusing even harder he thought he saw her lips move.

  “I’m sorry Justice. I’ll be here in the morning, and we will discuss things then.”

  Wait, he had heard her voice. This wasn’t supposed to be possible. Maybe, it was wishful thinking. Whatever it was, he felt better. Like he could sleep now, knowing she would be there in the morning. Even if it had only been in his fantasy the band around his heart let up.

  Justice knew, as he headed into the bedroom, that he could rest now. He would leave tomorrow to take care of itself.

  Chapter Seven

  Whether he heard her or not, Leanne felt better for trying to reach him. She thought, for a few minutes, that she had connected with him. Leanne saw that there was a fire going like she suggested; probably Faith had managed it by waving a finger like Leanne told her too. With a smile, Leanne realized she was indeed feeling better.

  Leanne looked out the front window and was surprised to see that it was dark out. More time had passed then she had realized.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t realize it was so late.”

  “It isn’t that late, it just seems to have gotten dark out early this evening.” Leanne saw that Faith looked out the window, following her gaze. It was almost an inky blackness outside, and there seemed to be a heavy smothering feel to the air. It felt like something was trying to get their attention. A dark and creepy something.

  Leanne was afraid that she and Faith were thinking the same thing and not just scaring themselves. Leanne heard Faith whisper, “I hope this is just a group of souls waiting to be judged, perhaps not realizing they aren’t ready.”

  “I don’t like this. It doesn’t feel right, but without Justice for the evening, I can’t go out there,” Leanne stood next to Faith at the window.

  They both knew that Brimstone was safe under the protection of the Higher gods. They had nothing to fear inside the city limits. Leanne and Faith looked out towards the forest, where it was darker than it had ever been before.

  Something was coming.

  Leanne tried to send her energy out to see
if she could get a reading on what was going on out there. Her vision blurred a little bit to better see what others couldn’t. What came back to her, was dark, malevolent. It sent shivers down her spine. Immediately clearing her vision, she said, “I hope that you’re right Faith, and this isn’t more. I hope that this isn’t a darker evil trying hard to come through the portal.”

  “Dare I ask you what your instinct is telling you right now?” Faith turned to Leanne, and Leanne knew that she was going to have to be brave.

  Leanne didn’t want to turn to her intuition and turned instead to her friend to let her know that. “It isn’t saying anything, but that is because I haven’t checked in with it. I’m afraid Faith.”

  “I know you are, but this time I’m here to sit with you through it. Besides, Justice will be here with you tomorrow morning. Leanne, the reason the scales and your gut always say the same thing; is because you control the scales. They have no magick of their own. It has always been you.”

  Leanne stared at Faith. “It was never the scales?” She whispered the questions, afraid she already knew the answer, had probably always known the answer, although she didn’t want to admit to it.

  “Not since you have been with Justice from the very first. The reason the Higher gods chose you, was because you were the only one capable of making these decisions. You see life through shades of grey, this makes you special.” Leanne saw that Faith had turned and smiled.