A Wife's War Read online

  A Wife’s War

  Table of Contents

  Cover

  Title Page

  April 1915

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Acknowledgements

  Copyright

  April 1915

  Chapter One

  Amends

  ‘I’m sick of this war.’ Squeezing another couple of books into the top of the wooden packing crate, Kate Channer shook her head in frustration. ‘I loathe it. No, I don’t loathe it, I hate it. I hate it with a… with a passion.’

  From the other side of the desk, Naomi Colborne leant across and patted her hand. ‘My dearest Kate,’ she said, ‘so do I. Indeed, I can’t imagine there’s a soldier’s wife in the land who doesn’t feel the same way.’

  While probably true, Kate was in no mood to be consoled. Her husband was away at war and she missed him. She wanted him back.

  ‘No sooner were the rings on our fingers,’ she continued, standing back to gauge the remaining space in the crate, ‘than our husbands were sent off Lord-knows-where to do heaven-only-knows-what. And them few days of leave aside, we ain’t seen hide nor hair of them since. Is it too much to ask the powers-that-be to let them come home from time to time? Or even to send word of their well-being now and again? Do we wives count for nothing?’ Reaching for another book, she pressed it on top of the others and, not waiting for Naomi to reply, went on, ‘I don’t blame our menfolk for volunteering, ma’am, truly I don’t, but honest to goodness, I do surely rue the day they did.’

  ‘I know,’ Naomi agreed, ‘the longer they’re gone, the harder it becomes. But we must bear our burden without complaint. Our husbands did a brave thing, and the least we can do is bear their absence with grace.’

  Grace. Hm. Not one of her fortes at the best of times. ‘It is terrible brave of them, ’course it is,’ she conceded, ‘doing what they did without a moment’s thought as to the perils of it, but at least they chose to do it. You an’ me, on the other hand, had no say in the matter. You an’ me are just left to wait and wonder and worry. But do the army care one jot for our nerves?’

  ‘It would seem not, no.’

  ‘Worse than that,’ she pressed on, Naomi’s words of agreement barely registering as she tried to wedge a particularly weighty tome onto the topmost layer of books, ‘but it’s doing shameful things to good folk – good folk like poor Mr Latimer.’

  ‘I know. That it should come to this is so terribly sad.’

  Heaving a lengthy sigh, Kate stepped back from the crate and surveyed the remaining books. When she had first learnt from Naomi that they were to travel back down to Woodicombe, she had struggled to hide her dismay. Having settled quite happily into her new life in Hartland Street, Devon had come to feel a world away, events at Woodicombe – such as they were – having long since become of no consequence to her. Indeed, being back there now, she felt out of place: no longer properly one thing nor the other – neither family nor staff.

  Staff, huh. There was another thing; apart from poor old Mr Channer – doing his best to see to everything outdoors all by himself – the only people now left below stairs were Edith and Mabel. According to the latter, in their rush to take on the jobs vacated by their enlisting menfolk, the dozen or so day girls and kitchen maids had left without so much as a backward glance: a couple of them going to take over the milking of the cows on Abe Pardey’s farm; a couple more going to learn the ropes in their uncle’s bakery; others choosing to risk life and limb fishing from dayboats whose crews had been left short-handed by departing brothers and cousins. Reflecting upon it all now, she shook her head. Not so long ago, she would have admired them for their courage and envied them their escape. Thankfully, she no longer needed to; she had a new life of her own now. Mercifully, it no longer mattered to her that with the loss of those girls – and the disappearance of their good-natured gossip and cheery chatter – below stairs had come to resemble a museum, a forlorn collection of lifeless rooms and echoing corridors.

  Lost in her ruminations, she sighed. Throughout the seemingly endless railway journey down from London, she had sat hoping that, once back in her former home, she wouldn’t be overcome by regret at having left. As it had turned out, she needn’t have worried, the sheer soullessness of the place meaning that no sooner had they set foot in the porch than she was itching to be back in Hartland Street.

  The wooden crate in front of her now packed to the point where not a single further book could be accommodated within, she heaved a vexed sigh. It was a sad state of affairs when a nice man had to sell a house that had been in his family for hundreds of years. Maybe even hundreds and hundreds of years. But then just about everything to do with this war was turning out to be unfair. If nothing else, the government had promised them it would be over and done with by now, the enemy defeated, the country jubilant, their menfolk safely back where they belonged.

  ‘I still don’t see why us being at war with the Germans means Mr Sidney has to sell this place,’ she said, casting her eyes over the row of book-filled crates.

  ‘Well, as I explained to you the other day, it came about because—­­­­­’

  Listening to Naomi once again explaining the reason for the sale of the house did nothing to change her mind; they were still having to pack up all of Mr Latimer’s possessions, and he was still losing his family’s home.

  ‘Shouldn’t nobody be made to sell up their house and all their belongings just because some mazed war has made their… their whatever-they-ares… worthless.’

  ‘Their stockholdings.’

  ‘Aye, them things. Poor Mr Sidney.’ She glanced to the rows of empty shelves, the only evidence now that several generations of Latimers had once collected books being the rectangular shapes left behind in the dust. ‘Still, fortunate for him, I suppose,’ she conceded wearily, ‘that your father had the means to buy it from him—’

  ‘Our father – that our father had the means.’

  ‘—sparing him the embarrassment of a full-blown sale – half the county traipsing in, picking over his knick-knacks, eyeing up the paintings and criticising the curtains.’

  ‘Yes,’ Naomi agreed, ‘I suppose that would have been worse.’

  ‘What’ll he do with it anyway?’ she asked, watching Naomi move away to look out through the window.

  ‘Do with it? I’m afraid I don’t understand you. What will who do with what?’

  ‘Mr Russell,’ she said, staring back down at the packed crate. ‘What is he minded to do with the place? Only, last time he was here, seemed to me he couldn’t wait to get away from it and back to London.’

  Across the room from her, Naomi looked thoughtful. ‘To be honest, I don’t know,’ she said. ‘He didn’t say – at least, not to me he didn’t. Other than wanting to help Uncle Sidney, I’m not sure he gave it much thought.’

  ‘Hm.’

  ‘It will be nice to have it in the family, though, don’t you think?’

  She frowned. ‘Not sure I follow you, ma’am.’

  ‘Well, one day, we will be able to bring our children and spend the summer here. There’s so much space for playing games and running around. And then there’s the cove where they’ll be able to learn to swim. Lawrence will love teaching them. He’s a terribly good swimmer.’

  Arching her back against the onset of stiffness, she tried to picture what Naomi was describing. She couldn’t recall there ever being children at Woodicombe – certainly not young ones. ‘I won
’t deny it,’ she said, picturing chubby-legged infants toddling about in the hallways, ‘a family would bring the place alive. But, to my mind, with the way we’re both fixed, the coming about of children is a long way off. Won’t neither of us be finding ourselves in the family way any time soon – least, not while our husbands are away fighting this war, we won’t. In any event, I can’t say as I feel ready for such things. I scarce feel like a wife yet, let alone a mother.’ It was true, too; the longer the war ground on, the less and less she felt like a married woman. And it was beginning to make her resentful. ‘And I don’t know who to blame for it most – the blessed Germans or all those doddery old men in our own government.’

  ‘But you are looking forward to starting a family, aren’t you?’

  She shrugged her shoulders. With Luke away, the question struck her as moot. ‘S’pose,’ she said flatly. ‘Once I’ve had the chance to be a proper wife for a bit first.’

  With Naomi making no move to comment, she glanced across the vast walnut desk to see her studying the cover of one of the few remaining books yet to be packed.

  ‘Great Expectations,’ Naomi announced. ‘By the look of it, a first edition. I remember reading this story at school. It’s the one about the orphaned child.’

  Without stopping to think, Kate scoffed. ‘An orphaned child? Not much fun to be had from a tale about an orphan, I shouldn’t think.’

  Carefully, Naomi closed the book. ‘Oh, I don’t know, an abandoned child and a tale of rags-to-riches always holds a certain appeal, does it not?’

  She shook her head. Where was the attraction of reading about hardships? Stories were supposed to tell of heroic adventures, or the search for true love, not the woes of orphans. Honestly, the whole world really did seem to be turning upside-down. ‘If you say so, ma’am.’

  ‘Kate, my dear Kate, I did ask that when it’s just the two of us together, you call me Naomi.’

  ‘I know you did, ma’am. Naomi. But, like I said to you at the time, I do fear that once it became a habit, I should slip up in front of company.’ That, she reflected, and the fact that she just didn’t seem able to do it; Naomi didn’t roll off the tongue without forethought in the same way that ma’am did.

  ‘Well, I shan’t insist either way. The last thing I want is for you to feel uncomfortable.’

  ‘No, I know that… ma’am. It just seems to me easier if I stick with the one thing.’

  ‘As you wish.’

  ‘Anyhow,’ she picked up again, ‘later on, I’ll fetch Mr Channer down to nail the lids onto these crates. Then, once you’ve written out the labels, they’ll be all set for fetching by the porter.’

  Naomi nodded. ‘I’ll attend to it straight after luncheon. Thank you for seeing to it all.’

  ‘Just doing what had to be done,’ she replied, at the same time drawn to examining her fingertips. Heavens, they were going to need a good long scrub with carbolic. ‘But now, if we’re done here, I’d best go and wash my hands.’

  Not so long ago, being able to pack up every trace of her past and forget about it was something she had craved. So why, now that she was dismantling what felt like the last little bits of it, did she feel overcome by such a deep sadness? Surely, given all that had happened within and around these four walls in the last year, things were turning out for the best, weren’t they? She had a new home and new employment. She could put Woodicombe behind her, couldn’t she?

  Beside her, Naomi stood examining her own hands. ‘Mine smell musty, too,’ she said. ‘But, before we go, there’s something I’ve been wanting to tell you.’

  Detecting a change to Naomi’s tone, Kate settled for wiping her hands down her apron. ‘Yes, ma’am?’

  ‘Although, once I have, you cannot repeat it to anyone.’

  Intrigued, she straightened up. What was this then? ‘Swear I won’t breathe a word.’

  ‘I know you won’t,’ Naomi remarked, ‘which is why I feel able to tell you that… I think I’m expecting a baby.’

  In that split of a second, Kate felt as though her breath had become stuck somewhere in her chest. Naomi was going to have a baby? That’s what all the talk of children and holidays had been in aid of?

  Momentarily too muddled to know how to reply, she frowned deeply. ‘N-not sure I understand,’ she stammered. Then, feeling her face reddening, she hastened to add, ‘What with Mr Lawrence so long gone, I mean.’

  Opening her mouth to reply, Naomi cast her eyes towards the partly open door to the hallway. Then, very softly, she said, ‘Well, you see, I do believe I’m already quite far along. When it comes to keeping track of my dates, I’ve always been quite the scatterbrain – an embarrassing thing to have to admit, I know. That said, I’m certain I’ve missed three months.’

  Three months. Now it made sense.

  ‘The menfolk had those few days of leave in January…’

  ‘Precisely. Which is why I don’t believe I’m mistaken.’

  Goodness. Naomi was going to start a family. When she’d mentioned having something to tell her, she hadn’t been expecting it to be that – hadn’t been expecting it to be joyous news. Joyous. Hm. If it was so joyous, why wasn’t she rushing to offer congratulations? Why did she feel as though she’d lost the use of her tongue? Yes, it was something of a shock, but that alone couldn’t account for why she was feeling so… but so what? What was she feeling? Unsettled? Disturbed? Panicked? Panicked. Yes, among other things she could definitely feel panic. But there was also relief; after all, it could have been her finding out that she was expecting a child. And the thought of that was nothing short of alarming. As she’d said only moments earlier, she barely felt married, let alone broody. It was true that she’d been Luke’s wife for more than seven months now but, in all of that time, they had spent less than ten days together. And less than ten nights. Indeed, only the other day, Naomi had joked that some women spent longer than that on their honeymoon. So how any husband and wife could welcome starting a family when they’d spent so little time together, she didn’t know. She certainly didn’t feel ready. And she didn’t think Luke would, either. Or would he? He’d made no secret of wanting children – four or five by his last reckoning. But that had been last summer – before he had sworn an oath and gone to war. Who knew what he thought now? She certainly didn’t.

  Realizing with a jolt that she had drifted off into her thoughts, she looked back up. Naomi was staring at her, her expression one of curiosity. And so, despite feeling deeply unsettled, and forcing herself to smile, she sidestepped the wooden packing-crates and reached to take Naomi’s hands.

  ‘But, ma’am, that’s tremendous!’ she said, giving them a quick squeeze and then letting them go. ‘Why wouldn’t you want no one knowing such a fine bit of news as that?’

  ‘I suppose because it feels only right that Lawrence should be the first to hear of it.’

  ‘Will you be writing to him, then?’ she asked. ‘Or will you be a-wanting to see the doctor first? Ma says there’s a new man hereabouts – a Doctor Huntleigh. Apparently, he’s a sight more purposeful than old Doctor Brinsworthy ever was – a good deal younger, too. You could telephone for him to come out. Ma says he goes about his house calls in a new motorcar.’

  To her suggestion, she was surprised to see Naomi shake her head.

  ‘No, I think I’d prefer to wait until we’re back in Hartland Street. After all, whether I am expecting or whether I’m not won’t change just because I delay finding out, will it? No, I’ll make it my first task once we get home. And then I shall write to Lawrence.’

  ‘He’ll be proper thrilled, won’t he?’ she said. Astonished was the actual word that had come to mind.

  ‘I suppose he will be, yes. Although perhaps somewhat astounded, too,’ Naomi agreed. ‘I mean, they were home barely four days. Almost half of their week’s leave was taken up with travelling.’

  Casting her mind back, she smiled. Their poor husbands had arrived home in a state of utter exhaustion. ‘Weren’t b
est pleased by that, were they?’ she said, recalling how the first thing Luke had done was sleep for more than twelve hours straight.

  ‘They were not,’ Naomi agreed. ‘But better a few brief days than none at all.’

  ‘Most surely.’

  ‘Anyway,’ Naomi continued, folding back her cuff to peer at her wristwatch, ‘to more mundane matters. With everything on Uncle Sidney’s list now taken care of, tomorrow morning I shall check the railway timetable and see about booking our tickets for the Paddington train. And, since that will mean making a trip into the village, why don’t we call in to that nice tea room afterwards and have a little treat?’

  She smiled. It was a nice idea. ‘I’d like that,’ she said.

  ‘In the meantime,’ Naomi added as she started to turn away, ‘don’t forget what you said to me about wanting to have a proper chat with Mrs Bratton and Edith. Clear the air, was how I think you put it.’

  In dismay, she shook her head. That old chestnut again. ‘To be fair, ma’am,’ she said, choosing her words carefully, ‘I think clear the air was how you put it.’

  ‘Well, irrespective of who said what, you know my view – one should never leave bad feelings to fester. And so, since we unexpectedly find ourselves back here, you have the perfect opportunity to make the first move – to be the better woman. Proffer the olive branch and bring about a reconciliation.’

  Proffer the olive branch. That was all very well for Naomi to say; she didn’t have to face Edith. Annoyingly, though, it didn’t change the fact that she was right. Matters between her and Edith and Mabel had been left somewhat unresolved and did continue to sit uneasily with her – did still gnaw away at her conscience even from a distance of two-hundred-odd miles. So, yes, she really ought to go down and have a proper chat with them. Reconcile. But not right now, though. No, she’d make time for that later. She’d need to get herself into the right sort of mood before taking on that task.

  Following Naomi out of the study, she pulled the door closed, her thoughts returning to news of the baby. She was happy for her, of course she was. But piercing her happiness was still that odd little prickle of what could only really be envy. Why? By her own admission, she was relieved not to find herself in the same position. Perhaps, then, it had more to do with how thrilled Naomi seemed. That could be it: perhaps what she envied wasn’t so much that Naomi was going to start a family, but that she was so delighted by the prospect.