Emotions Series 03 Forgotten Emotions Read online

  Tom tossed the blanket he had into a refresher and another flash sparked before his eyes. He saw himself standing before a console tapping commands into it. Suddenly, an inspiration struck. He remembered something about data banks and the personal files of the whole crew. Maybe if he could get into his own file, he would get some answers to the many questions he had.

  He went as fast as he could to Harry's quarters. He knew the ensign was on duty and wouldn't be back for hours. He looked around the main room until he found the desk terminal in a small side office. He saw down at the desk and tapped some commands. The computer beeped and he smiled.

  *Finally, I'm remembering,* he thought as he answered the computer's request with one of his own.

  "Access the file of Thomas Eugene Paris, Lt."

  "Please enter the authorization codes," the computer replied.

  *Authorization Codes?* Tom thought, his hopes failing, *I don't know any authorization codes.*

  When the computer repeated the inquiry, Tom simply blurted out the first numbers that came to mind, "Paris, beta-five-nine- two-six."

  He was surprised when the computer beeped and said, "Working."

  *It worked!?* Tom blinked. He couldn't believe it. He actually remembered something. Maybe he would remember more. He smiled as he waited for the computer to finish.

  The computer beeped a few moments later, bringing Tom's attention back to it. He stared at the picture before him and blinked. In the picture, he looked much younger, but none too happy.

  He shrugged the thought away and turned to the text. Tom's eyes widened at what he discovered. Tom Paris was the son of an important Admiral and had a promising career in Starfleet. He rubbed his eyes as he read on about the shuttle crash, his cover-up, and then his confession.

  The doors open soundlessly behind him, Tom was so engrossed in his reading he hadn't heard. Harry entered his cabin and noticed that the lights were on and that someone was in his office. He walked in and saw Tom sitting at the terminal and he looked upset. The ensign walked up behind his friend and looked at what Tom was reading.

  *Oh, no,* Kim thought, *He's reading his personal file. He won't like what's in there.*

  Harry was about to stop Tom from reading anymore, but it was too late. Tom had shut it off the terminal and was getting out of the chair. He was startled to see Harry standing behind him.

  "You probably have already guessed what I've done," Tom said, barely above a whisper.

  Harry nodded his head, "You pulled up your file in hopes that it might help you remember. Tom, what's in those files..."

  "Am I really like that?" Tom asked, his eyes full of fear and hurt, "am I really what that file says? Am I some reckless, careless outcast that everyone despises?"

  Harry shook his head before Tom could continue, "Maybe, I don't know. I never saw the Tom Paris that those words describe. But that text doesn't describe the Tom Paris that helped this ship and the people aboard it. It doesn't tell of the times you saved many lives by risking your own. It doesn't say how caring a man you are, how self-sacrificing. You've come a long way from that selfish person that that file says you were."

  Tom offered a small smile, but he couldn't believe what Harry was telling him. Something inside him though told him that Harry was right. People could change, so why couldn't someone who was selfish and reckless. He then remembered one reason that could change a person like that. Children. He sat up straight, and looked at Harry.

  "The boys," Tom said, "I want to see them."

  Harry smiled, it was good that Tom was finally making decisions on his own. He nodded and the two left Kim's quarters.

  *****

  "Captain, I'm picking up a ship," the ensign at Ops announced, "It's hailing us."

  "On screen," Janeway said as she sat down in her chair.

  The starfield was replaced by a very familiar face. Janeway's eyes narrowed as she stared at Daylia, the former leader of the Amazon race.

  "Hello, Captain Janeway," Daylia said with sarcasm, "I believe you have someone I want."

  *****

  Tom and Harry were just leaving the turbolift and heading for the Paris-Torres' quarters when Janeway voice sounded, "Kim and Paris to the Bridge. Now. We have visitors."

  Harry looked at Tom. He knew why the Captain would call him to the Bridge, but why Tom? He hardly remembered his past, let alone how to fly. He mentally shrugged and headed back toward the turbolift with Tom on tow. He hoped the Captain knew what she was doing.

  ******

  *Why did I call for Paris?* Janeway asked. She answered herself by saying, *Habits are hard to break. Maybe it is time for Tom to have a look at the Bridge. He just might remember something.*

  She was brought out of her thoughts when she heard the turbolift doors open and close. She didn't have to turn around to see who it was. She knew.

  "Ah, Teryek," Daylia said when she noticed Tom, "How nice to see you. Don't worry. I'll soon have to back where you belong."

  "He belongs here," Janeway said firmly, eyeing the Lady dangerously, "He will stay here."

  Daylia glared at the captain, "He belongs with me, Captain. I want him. If you do not give him to me, I will destroy you."

  "They are powering up weapons, Captain, "Tuvok announced, "She clearly means to destroy us."

  Tom moved to stand in behind the Conn. He suddenly received another flash. He saw himself sitting at the station, his fingers flying over the controls. He suddenly had an urgent need to be in that chair.

  "Understood, Tuvok," Janeway said as she looked at Tom. She was watching him stare at the conn station. She mentally smiled. Something was coming back to him. She then addressed the Lady, "I'm sorry, Lady, but I will not hand Tom over to you. He is a member of my crew and a very valuable one. He belongs here."

  Daylia's eyes narrowed and darkened, "I warn you, Captain. If you don't hand him over, I will destroy your ship."

  Tom stared at Daylia. She clearly meant what she said. He looked at Janeway who was glaring at the woman on the screen. She clearly did not intend to hand him over. He had to do something or they might all be killed.

  "Captain," he said, going to stand in front of her, "I'll go. I don't want everyone to be killed, because of me."

  Janeway smiled. This Tom was very familiar to her. He was willing to sacrifice himself in order to save them." She couldn't let him do such a thing. They needed him, and B'Elanna needed him more.

  "No, Tom," she said softly, "You belong here. I will not hand you over to Daylia."

  "But," he started to say, but she held up a hand to stop him.

  "You're needed here, Tom. That's all I'm going to say on the matter."

  Tom blinked back his surprise then turned to stare at the woman on the screen. He could see that she wanted him dearly and would kill to get him. Tom then remembered B'Elanna fighting to get him back. He smiled slightly, but it was a wicked smile. He knew then that if Daylia couldn't win a fight against B'Elanna then she definitely couldn't defeat Janeway. He moved to one side as Janeway stood and went to stand behind the Conn.

  "You are not getting him, Daylia," Janeway said, crossing her arms, "We will fight to keep him here where he belongs."

  "So be it!" Daylia snarled.

  "Shields up!" Janeway barked as she moved to claim her seat. She then jerked forward as a blast hit the ship.

  "Shields are holding, Captain," Tuvok reported.

  Two more blasts rocked the ship, causing Tom to fall to the ground. He tried to get up, but was knocked to the ground again. A sudden flash blinded him as another vision came to his eyes. He saw himself in the middle of a battle, his fingers flying across the controls of the helm. It was then that Tom realized where he needed to be.

  "Shields at seventy percent," Tuvok announced as another blast rocked him into his station. He barely even shook his head as he returned the enemies' fire.

  "Move," Tom told Chakotay at the helm.

  Chakotay stared strangely at the younger man, "Are you gi
ving me an order, Lieutenant?"

  Another blast hit the ship, and Chakotay maneuvered Voyager to where they had a better aim of the other ship. Phaser fire hit the other ship, damaging it.

  "Aliens' shields are at sixty percent."

  "Let me have the controls," Tom said again.

  "Do you remember how to fly, Paris?" Chakotay asked as he maneuvered the ship again. This time to avoid a blast. He then turned back to Tom.

  "I don't know, but I do know that I need to be at the controls."

  "Tom, let Chakotay fly the ship. We can't avoid to follow your hunches right now."

  "But Captain..."

  The ship was rocked by a more powerful blast. It knocked Tom off his feet again and onto the floor. Sparks shot out of two consoles and one exploded.

  "Shields at fifty percent," Tuvok said. His fingers flew across the controls as he fired at the ship. The crew watched as a wing on the alien ship exploded into space.

  "Their shields are at thirty percent and falling, Captain."

  Chakotay maneuvered the ship around again as it avoided several more blasts from the enemy ship. He looked over at Tom to see that the pilot was still lying on the floor. He then quickly moved his eyes back to the viewscreen as he decided his next move. It obviously was the wrong one as they were hit by another blast. Tuvok retaliated though and the Daylia's ship exploded before them.

  "Damage report," Janeway ordered after several moments.

  "Minor damage on decks one through three," Harry reported, "No serious casualties."

  Janeway nodded then looked to see Tom lying on the floor. Chakotay was over him checking for a pulse. He looked at her as she went to them.

  "He's alive. He must have hit his head. Again."

  The two smiled as Janeway tapped her commbadge, "Janeway to transporter room one. Beam Lt. Paris to Sickbay."

  After the blue beam took Tom away, she looked at the Commander and said, "Tell B'Elanna what's happened. You have the Bridge. I'll be in Sickbay."

  Chakotay nodded. He then tapped his comm badge and asked Engineering for damage reports before he told B'Elanna the news. He knew she would be on her way to Sickbay before she even gathered her complete report.

  Chapter 13

  Tom Paris slowly woke to see the familiar grey ceiling of Sickbay. He closed his eyes and groaned.

  "Mr. Paris?" A voice came to his ears, "Can you hear me?"

  Tom opened his eyes to see the Doctor hovering over him. Feeling a throbbing pain in his head, he closed his eyes. He put a hand to his forehead and moaned.

  The Doctor opened his tricorder and scanned his patient. After a while, he spoke, "You hit your head during the battle. You have a slight concussion. I'll give you something for the pain."

  Tom opened his eyes at the sound of a hypospray. He then turned his attention to the new arrivals when he heard the doors to Sickbay open. He was not surprised to see Captain Janeway, but the concern on B'Elanna's face confused him.

  "Tom," the chief engineer said as she went to stand beside him. She stroked his hair as she looked into his confused blue eyes.

  "What's wrong, Tom," B'Elanna asked as Janeway joined them.

  "Tom?" The helmsman asked even more confused, "Since when did you call me Tom? What happened to 'pig'?"

  B'Elanna looked at Janeway, her dark eyes worried and confused. Janeway stepped closer and asked, "What do you remember, Tom?"

  Tom stared at both of them. He didn't understand what was going on. He must have hit his head harder than any of them thought. The pilot closed his eyes as he tried to remember the previous events. The Doctor mentioned a battle. What battle? He then took a deep breath and answered, "The last thing I remember is going to the Bridge. I then woke up here."

  Janeway and B'Elanna looked at each other. Janeway nodded, telling her engineer that Tom was in fact on the Bridge during the fight. They looked at the pilot and Janeway spoke, "There was a battle between a hostile people. The leader wanted you back. Do you know who she was?"

  Tom opened his eyes and stared at them confused, "An alien wanted me back? What do you mean an alien wanted me back?"

  B'Elanna spoke then, "This alien, a woman, had taken you as her slave, Tom. She drugged you and made you do things against your will."

  Tom sat up then, "They drugged me!? What did she make me do!? And why don't I remember?!"

  Janeway placed her hand on his shoulder to calm him, "Yes, she drugged you. I won't go into what she made you do. That is between you and B'Elanna."

  Tom stared at B'Elanna, shocked. "Did she kidnap you as well, Torres? Did she drug you? What did she make us do?"

  All kinds of things ran through Tom's mind. They could have done many things while they were drugged. He shivered as dark thoughts entered his mind. He didn't want to think about them, so he shook his head to banish them.

  "She only put us through hell, Tom," B'Elanna said as she stroked his hair. This confused him even more. Why was she suddenly so concerned about him?

  B'Elanna continued, "The aliens who kidnapped you made us all think you were dead. It was three months before we found you in that village on that alien planet. They had enslaved you. The leader wouldn't let you go. I had to fight her for you."

  Tom stared at her. She fought for him? He looked at Janeway, who nodded. Frustrated, he asked, "What the hell is going on here!?" He looked at B'Elanna, "Why are you suddenly so concerned about me? What happened on that planet?"

  Janeway and B'Elanna stared at each other. The Captain could see the hurt, fear, and confusion flash across the half-Klingon's dark eyes. He clearly didn't remember at all.

  Janeway looked at Tom, who was waiting for an answer. He was afraid and confused as well. She had to tell him what has been going on.

  "Tom," Janeway began slowly, "The leader of that village wanted you has a sexual slave. She drugged you and tortured you into being submissive. When B'Elanna and I found you, you were so passive we thought you'd never be the same Tom again. You also had amnesia. We tried for weeks to get you to remember. Then the leader returned and threatened to destroy this ship if we didn't give you back to her. We fought her and won, and you were injured in the battle."

  Tom stared at both of them again. He closed his eyes and slowly exhaled. Another alien woman took advantage of him. At least, this time it was all her fault. He hoped it was all her fault. He looked at them. B'Elanna still stared at him with concern, but there was a hint of fear in her dark eyes.

  "What's wrong?" he asked.

  B'Elanna looked down then back at him. She appeared nervous all of a sudden. He knew there was something up and she was afraid to tell him.

  "What, Torres? Just tell me."

  B'Elanna stared at him. She swallowed and took the plunge, "The reason I fought for you against that, p'taQ, is because you are my mate. We are married."

  Tom's eyes opened wide in shock. How the hell did that happen?! More importantly: When? He didn't remember any ceremony or anything that made her change her mind about him. He shook his head and suddenly felt very dizzy. He slowly lied down and closed his eyes.

  "How long have we been married? When did we get married?" he asked, trying to stop the spinning sensation in his head.

  "We have been married for about a year, Tom," B'Elanna said calmly. Inside, her stomachs were flip-flopping. He didn't remember them getting married, but he knew her and he knew the captain. Something was wrong here. Completely wrong.

  Tom looked at her. He searched her eyes and saw that she was telling the truth. He shook his head. This was too much. He must be in some parallel universe. That was the only explanation for everything that was happening to him. He slowly sat up and looked at the captain.

  "Captain, did we run into any strange anomilies recently?"

  Both Janeway and B'Elanna stared at each other. They knew immediately what he was thinking. Janeway decided to set him straight.

  "No, Tom. We didn't. This is not another universe. You had amnesia for what we assume to be
approximately three to four months. You are just now seem to be remembering, thanks to that bump on your head you received on the Bridge, but it also seem you to lose your most recent memories. I know it is overwhelming, but give it some time. You will remember everything soon."

  "Like when I married B'Elanna?" Tom looked at the half-Klingon. He knew he was attracted to her for some time, but she always tried her best to stay clear away from him. When did she suddenly change her mind?

  "B'Elanna," Tom said slowly. He didn't want to upset her or get her angry, "When did you change your mind about me?"