Snodgrass, Catherine Read online

  "What baby?" he asked.

  She stared at the books lining the shelves to avoid looking at him. "It's a silly thing. Nothing, really. In fact, I haven't felt that way-"

  "What baby?" It was a demand now. Irritation punctuated each word.

  Dani looked down at her hands. "Sometimes I'll wake up suddenly and feel as though I've lost track of a baby."

  "Have you ever had a baby?"

  "I've never even been pregnant." Frowning, she clicked her gaze to his. It was her turn to take the offensive. "Why would you tell me the baby is dead?"

  Alec squirmed and looked away. "I have no idea. The words just came out."

  "A little cruel, don't you think?"

  Sighing, he massaged his forehead. "What are you doing in my office? You should be in your room."

  Dani rolled her neck to ease the sudden ache. "I came to tell you something."

  His fingers slipped to her neck. "Let me."

  She scooted around to give him better access. "You probably need this more than me. Your head must be killing you."

  "I'll doctor, you patient. Now, what was so important that you had to sneak down here to tell me?"

  With each press of his fingers, Dani's tension faded. "Your chief of staff paid me a visit."

  Alec froze. What in the world was he thinking? No wonder Dani was upset. "What did he say?"

  "He kept wanting to know about the nurse who gave me that shot for nausea yesterday afternoon."

  "Nurse? You saw her?"

  Dani nodded. "She seemed very nice. That's why..."

  His laughter cut her off.

  Dani turned around and puzzlement wrinkled her forehead. "What's so funny?"

  Still smiling, he tapped the end of her nose. "Nothing."

  There was a nurse. Renee was in the clear. All the worries, the fears were for nothing. Reality erased his joy. There was still the issue of a nurse in the hospital deliberately harming patients.

  He glanced down at Dani. At least she was safe and so close he never wanted to let her go. The memory of her body nestled against his when he woke sent a tremor of a different kind through his body. He watched her gaze drop down to his lips and mirrored her actions. If she only knew how close he was to kissing her.

  The flickering emotions upon his face amazed Dani. Laughter, concern, and then something else. His hand shifted lower, bracing her back. If she didn't know better, she would say he was going to kiss her. Her heart raced with anticipation.

  What was it Dr. Rushmore had said? That Alec likened his patients to sculpting. That was all she was, all she would ever be-his latest project. She reined her heart to normal. Still, if only it would be possible to...

  Dani dropped her head and pulled back. "I should be getting back to my room before someone panics."

  He stood with her. "I'm sure they already have. I'll go with you."

  Considering the awkwardness that had sprung up between them, Dani rather wished he didn't. But she needed a plausible excuse for being gone, and he was the only logical person to give it.

  There was a proprietary hand to the small of her back as he led her off the elevator and through the gauntlet of nursing staff. His explanation of examining her in his office was greeted without question. Although one young nurse reminded him to tell them the next time.

  He delivered her to her room, and then hovered over her until she crawled into bed.

  "I'll be out of the hospital the rest of the day, and I have surgery in the morning. If you need me, here's my beeper number." He whipped out a business card.

  Dani thought she felt the tiniest of squeezes as he tucked it into her fingers. It may as well have been a blow from a sledgehammer. Too quickly he stepped back and strode from her side. She listened as his footsteps blended with others and then disappeared altogether.

  "Well...that was interesting," Elsie said.

  "How so?" Dani muttered, still watching the door.

  "I believe that man is sweet on you."

  The concept was laughable...wasn't it? "I seriously doubt that."

  "He just gave you his beeper number, dear. Doctors don't normally do that. They usually guard their privacy. Trust me, I know what I'm talking about."

  So it seemed. Yet instead of feeling joy over the revelation, all Dani could feel was panic...heart-pounding panic.

  * * *

  Chapter Eight

  Somehow Alec managed to avoid eye contact with any of the staff on his march to Walt's office. He didn't care if they thought his behavior odd. Someone, one of them, was a potential murderer, a traitor to the medical profession and the hospital. How could he look at any of them without hauling them against the wall and demanding to know if they were the one?

  His faith was shattered. His trust in the inherent goodness of what they were doing here destroyed. Through this red haze of betrayal, one happy thought was able to sneak in-at least it wasn't Renee.

  He felt a tremendous amount of guilt for having suspected her in the first place. But how was he to know? The evidence seemed to be there.

  Her innocence was clear. She was truly the close friend she claimed and, hopefully, the woman Kevin believed her to be. All Alec could do now was wish them well, support Kevin's plan, and be there if it all fell apart. So where did that leave him and Dani?

  Alec snorted. He didn't want to think about Dani now. He was too rattled by their last meeting. But it looked like that was exactly where his mind was going to go-not on Dani his patient, but on Dani the woman.

  In his sleep he dreamed of her, soft and warm and inviting, nestled against him. His body responded with an aching intensity that demanded to be appeased. As he reached to draw her close, the ground quivered beneath them as if the very earth felt the connection between them. The movement grew, shattering his dream, his sleep, and he realized Dani was protected in his arms, just as he realized the baby she unconsciously searched for was dead.

  What baby?

  Alec stopped short of Walt's door and swiped his fingers through his hair. Just thinking about it put him on the edge of hyperventilation. None of it was real, yet he wanted to fall on his knees and weep over the loss of a nonexistent child.

  "If you're looking for Dr. Rushmore, I just saw him leave, Dr. Edwards."

  Alec looked around as the nurse zipped by. Was she the one? Thinking about it made his head ache even more. He'd confront Walt at home. They could talk more freely there. But that meant leaving Dani alone, unprotected.

  What choice did he have? No matter how strong his attraction to her, he had other patients to consider. She couldn't be his sole priority. If he didn't stay focused, everyone was going to suffer.

  But Dani wasn't alone. Visitors would surround her, and Alec knew there were two of them he could trust.

  Glad to finally take some positive action, he hurried back to Dani's room. Things were as he expected. Between Dani and Elsie, there were twelve people in the room. Young and old, male and female, mingled, no one mindful of whom they were there to visit.

  Alec held back, watching the scene. Despite the difference in their ages, Dani and Elsie weren't that much different. If he didn't know better, Alec would swear there was a relationship between them. And in watching Elsie, he wondered if he were seeing a glimpse of what Dani would be when she reached that age.

  Both were vivacious women, loved by friends, co-workers, and, in Dani's case, high school students. They attracted people through the sheer force of their personality.

  It was no wonder Alec was drawn to Dani. He loved the way she smiled and her way with people. How could he have allowed lust to taint their relationship? Oh, he wanted her, no doubt about that. But he refused to let an ugly word like lust diminish her value.

  His gaze traveled the circuit of the room and fell from time to time upon Dani's face. She looked tired. Didn't they see that? Why didn't she say something to them? She sat cross- legged on her bed with a boy of about sixteen across from her. A map was spread out between them. But, instead
of following the directions she pointed out, the boy stared enraptured at her face, her hair...and right down the top of her pajamas.

  A red haze clouded Alec's vision. He shoved his way into the room and stomped toward his target. Dani barely had time to gasp before he grabbed the boy by the collar and hauled him into the corridor.

  "Hey, man, what's going on?" the boy asked.

  Alec slammed him up against the wall and pinned him beneath his forearm. "I think you know what's going on. Tell me, you little pervert, did you get a good look?"

  The boy blinked while he sputtered for a response. "I...I don't know what you're talking about."

  Alec pressed him harder into the wall. "And a liar too."

  He balled his shirt in his fist and hauled him forward until his could smell the greasy burger he'd had for lunch on his breath. "Save the cheap thrills for one of your little girlfriends. I don't want to see your worthless ass around this hospital again. If I do, I'll-"

  "That's enough, Alec," Kevin said from behind. "Let him go."

  Alec shoved the boy away from him.

  Eyes wide with fear, the boy staggered back, then caught his balance and sprinted for the elevator.

  Alec waited until the doors closed him in before turning around to face Kevin. He didn't realize Dani would be standing there too.

  Anger highlighted the hint of gold in her brown eyes and erased any pretense of the mild-mannered woman he had seen before. Her intent clear on confrontation, she shoved her way past Kevin. For one brief moment, Alec felt the urge to cover his groin. He met her lethal stare with one of equal energy.

  Dani jerked a finger toward the elevator. "What the hell was that all about? That was uncalled for."

  Alec took a stride forward, forcing her to bend her neck back to glare up at him. "He was looking right down your top."

  His words were low, measured, for her ears, not those of the nursing staff hovering at the nearby station. As Dani absorbed them, a pink flush brightened her skin. Still her gaze held steady.

  "I'm sure he didn't mean anything by it. He's a kid."

  Alec clenched his jaw in an effort to stop the tick twitching at his temple. "Trust me. He knew what he was doing."

  The pink tinge turned into a full-fledged blush. She broke eye contact and her gaze dropped to his mouth. There was a shift to her demeanor, and in that action Alec felt her very soul wrap around his. It was all he could do to keep his hands at his sides and away from the woman who unconsciously beckoned to him.

  Kevin gently pulled Dani away. Smiling, he turned her over to Renee's care. "It's been a rough couple of days. Dani, you'll have to excuse Alec. He's like a bear with a sore ass when he's tired and I can tell he's close to exhaustion right now. And as your future friend-in-law and a doctor in my own right, I'd say you're not far behind. Visiting hours are over."

  She dusted a chill from her arms. "No, please don't hurt their feelings. I'll be fine."

  The far-away look in her eyes followed her back to the room. Now it was Alec's turn to fall under Kevin's care, but the looks he got were less than friendly.

  "Let's go." With a jerk of his thumb, Kevin motioned to the lounge.

  Short of making another scene, Alec had no choice but to follow. Once there, Kevin propped himself against the counter and folded his arms over his chest. Alec sank onto the vinyl couch. It squeaked in protest and then sighed as if giving itself up to its fate.

  "I'd offer you a cup of coffee, but it looks like you've had one too many as it is."

  "He was-"

  "Looking down her top. Yes, I heard." He made a sound somewhere between a laugh and a snort. "What's the matter with you? You haven't been right since the night the accident happened."

  Alec squeezed the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger. He didn't want to go into all this. His reaction was over-the-top and uncharacteristic. Yet each time he thought of the kid salivating over the glimpse he had stolen, Alec wanted to snap his scrawny neck.

  Then to have her stand so close. No, that wasn't correct. He had stepped into her space and staked his claim. His reaction had put the boy's to shame. Thank God his lab coat had hidden it. Now...if it would just go away.

  "Someone's trying to kill her."

  "I thought the car wreck was an accident."

  "It was. I mean here...someone here. That nurse Renee saw yesterday gave Dani an injection of morphine and dirty water."

  Kevin gave a long, low whistle, and, absorbing the shock, stared at the tabletop. "Anyone else?"

  Alec shook his head. "Not that I know of, but then I haven't checked and I certainly haven't asked around. I've only just had my suspicions confirmed. I was on my way to talk to Walt about it. Can you keep an eye on things here?"

  An absentminded nod followed. Alec was nearly to the door when Kevin's confusion faded.

  "That still doesn't explain why you hauled that kid off the way you did."

  Alec didn't bother to turn around. "I'm dead tired. His flagrant disrespect set me off wrong. Beep me if you need me."

  He hurried away before Kevin could dissect his excuse. But once in the haven of his car, Alec lost his purpose. There was no sense trying to confront Walt now. Everything would come out jumbled. He was rattled, his emotions raw.

  Dani was safe for now. That was all that mattered. Kevin would protect her. Walt could wait a little while longer.

  * * *

  Dani knew the minute Alec left the hospital. No one had to tell her. She just felt the absence of his presence. Now, if only the heat that remained after their encounter would go with him. Her body was flushed with warmth, taking away any rational thought, any thought but of him.

  If she lived to be a million years old, Dani would never forget the way he surrounded her in the hallway. Not his body, his...she hated to think of the word. It was too mystical, and she was not the type to indulge in psychic phenomena. But there was no other way to describe it. His aura engulfed hers. Feelings rushed in upon her, intense, conflicting. And it had taken every ounce of strength Dani could muster to stand within that halo of Alec's and not give in.

  Desire had twisted her heart, her stomach. Heart-breaking pain followed in equal force. Her hand twitched from the compulsion to whip it across his face and at one point almost burned as if she had done so.

  Thinking about it made the sensation in her hand return. Dani curled her fingers into her chest. Then there was the need to drive her knee deep in his groin. A hundred times since then she had asked herself why. The answer was puzzling. Because of the pain, hurt, and betrayal he had caused. Yet Alec had done nothing but help her.

  The spell had been broken when Kevin had pulled her away. From the instant Dani had stepped away, all she wanted was to be near Alec once more. She longed to drape herself around him, to feel his arms wrap her in a steel-like embrace, to cry for the loss of...

  Dani's breath caught. There it was again-that thing about the baby. A baby she had never had, that never existed.

  "Miss Morgan, what's wrong?"

  Of all the students to notice her distress, Dani was lucky enough to have it be Brandy. The girl's high-pitched screech scattered the rest of the visitors, and brought first Renee and then Kevin to her side.

  Kevin snatched up her wrist before Dani could assure them she was fine. "You're hyperventilating. Why? What's wrong? What do you feel? Are you sick?"

  Dani pulled free of his hold. "I was thinking about something and it scared me. That's all."

  "That's all?" His eyebrows arched. "Your pulse is racing."

  "I'm fine...really. I just need..." To be left alone and go home where everything is familiar and safe. "I need a little fresh air. To walk around and stretch my legs."

  He waved his arm to her company. "Visiting hours are over for the day. Miss Morgan needs her rest."

  So much for the fresh air and walk. At least her privacy was insured. Still, it took several minutes more for each individual to say good-bye, give her hugs, gather whatever pers
onal items they had brought, and leave. To make certain they found the exit, Kevin and Renee provided escort. But when Elsie's friends also decided to go, Dani refused to allow it. After all, there was no need for Elsie to suffer because of her.

  Forcing a smile, she swung her legs over the side of the bed. "Dr. Samuels is overreacting. I need a walk, not rest. I won't be long."

  No one challenged her presence in the corridor. Dani doubted they would be as lenient if they knew her objective was the elevator again. But she needed air, sunshine, neither of which was present in these sterile halls. Somewhere there had to be a patio or a courtyard for patients. All Dani had to do was find it.

  "Where do you think you're going?"

  Dani jumped at the sound of the nurse's voice. Trying to appear nonchalant, she glanced over her shoulder as if she had every right to do whatever she pleased. "I was looking for some place to walk in the fresh air."

  The young woman smiled. "Wrong elevator. The one to the gardens is on the other end of the ward. It gives patients access while also allowing them privacy so they don't have to traipse through the hospital in their pajamas."

  Dani followed the woman's directions. In less time than it took to walk to the elevator, she was standing at the entrance to the arboretum.

  Birdsong mingled with gurgling water to set the tone in the garden paradise. Tall trees in the center reached to the glass ceiling while sunlight filtered through to kiss the branches. A wide path edged with pansies curved into the foliage, beckoning visitors to take a walk. To one side, a pair of elderly gentleman hovered over a checkerboard. It could have been just a day at the park, except for the fact they were wearing hospital robes.

  Smiling, Dani let the walkway claim her. At the first turn all the signs of a hospital disappeared behind flowers and greenery. She wandered along the path and enjoyed the serenity. From time to time she caught a glimpse of other patients strolling through the maze or sitting on the many benches strewn throughout the garden. Visitors were sparse, probably due to the afternoon hour when most patients napped.